Verbal abuse is damaging.
I feel so bad for those kids and there is nothing I can do because NO ONE acknowledges verbal abuse. If I say anything you'll stop letting me see the kids and at least by seeing them I can encourage them and let them know that they are special and loved...

It angers me that you condone her behavior. Have you not learned anything from our childhood? Do you not remember how hard it was growing up with a mother who berated you and a father who sat by and let it help ... you have the power to speak up ... you have the power to try and stop it ...