Thread: Triggering (Suicide): Returning to my prison cell
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NeuroBeautiful Offline
Please call that story back.
I've been here a while
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Returning to my prison cell - February 9th 2018, 02:23 AM

This thread has been labeled as triggering, particularly on the subject of suicide, by the original poster or by a Moderator. The contents of this thread therefore might not be suitable for certain sensitive users. Please take this into consideration before continuing to read.

Banging on cages,
rage takes over,
logic flies out of my brain,
I am going insane

Fighting till my voice is strained and my knuckles are bruised
I was dying to live, begging to escape.
Please get me out of here,
I shake the metal bars, no way can this go on
Make it stop
I want to have for myself- a life.


A taste of what it's like to be free
A chance to rest, a chance to experience who is 'me'
A small glimpse to show, yes
there's a world out there, beyond
these miserable marks of time and space
There's a life out of this hell of a tunnel
A hope for rebuilding life

But it's not for me, it's not for me to have
It's not my place, it is not in my range
It is not something I can imagine I'd deserve
It is not something that would stay in my hands
Every time I thought I'd be okay again
That sense of hope drifts away like bubbles in the wind

Back into the prison cell, back into the fiery hell
I will return to where I belong and stop trying to fight my conditions
There is no point, I can just rot here instead
Clearly I deserve this treatment till I am dead
I won't even have to do much
The pool of my tears will be enough
Now I know a life for me is not possible
Kicking and screaming is not an option
Neither is strategic planning and setting up a system
None of what I've done to survive matters in the end
I am dying to die
Let the remains of my body float down the stream
Wash the blood away, let my soul get its relief
Only then I can truly be free.


~Show Yourself
Step Into Your Power~

~Grow Yourself,
Into Something New~