[obelus]

Hey there, Jade.

I wholeheartedly believe that mental health needs to come first. I don't think life ever really goes according to plan, but that's okay! You have your entire life to attain your college degree(s) and get to where you want to be, but you have to be alive and well to do that. If you feel this may continue to contribute to you feeling unsafe and suicidal then it would be wise to reevaluate your situation and options. There is no shame in taking a bridge semester if you decide that is what's best for you. You need to be realistic and honest with yourself in making this decision. You know how your bipolar and PTSD symptoms affect you, so it's important to consider what you are like when you are doing well and not so well. Also take into account how often you change from well to unwell.

I'm not sure how education works where you live, but in the US there's the option of online courses and there are some colleges that function entirely online aside from exams. I know there is at least one similar option in the UK and I'm almost positive most places would have one or more options. I'm mentioning this because online courses can often be easier to manage compared to courses that you attend on campus. The college you currently attend may have the option of online courses, too.

Personally, I can relate to this. I decided that I needed a break when I lost my funding during a very bad semester. The break was significantly beneficial for me and I plan to return once I sort out the funding issues, but please remember that we are entirely different people. My experiences and circumstances are different than yours. You know yourself best and how much you can handle.

You ultimately need to do what is best for you and your mental health. If you don't already and it's an option, then I suggest seeking help from a professional. They would be able to help you create a plan for what you are experiencing. If your college has counselors you should utilize that option, too.

I wish you the best in making this decision and staying safe.