[del677]

You're overthinking this.

Try some meditation, where you learn to focus on yourself and the present moment and just focus on your breathing. The trick is to activate the Parasympathetic Nervous System for a while. That's the "Rest, Digest, Restore," response. Get that going, give the brain a rest, practice this every day for a couple weeks, and over time this will strengthen activity in certain parts of the brain, and lessen activity in the "fear" parts of the brain, and you'll naturally become less fearful, and more sociable, without really trying, it'll just happen.

I know because I'm doing the exact opposite right now, and I'm noticing the effects of it! I've been working my tail off, just work, sleep, repeat. And I notice I've lost that social ability I had only a couple months ago. I really need to focus on doing more exercise and meditation and group activities.

I also haven't figured out where to find suitable partners, since I too am introverted. However I suspect there are other introverted people out there who would enjoy being with me. I just need to find them. Or flip that around and be somewhere they can find me.

I've found meditation also helps with the "Do the right thing" vs. "Do what you want to do" problem. Over time it helps me not be hard on myself and worry if this or that is the right thing to do. And worry less about the past. And the future.

I think it helps me really connect with other people and think of what they want and need, instead of focusing on what I want and need. People like it when I focus on them and their needs instead of myself. I think.

Sorry I'm probably not the best dating coach, having had only moderate experience in that.

She may say she has a boyfriend, though I sometimes wonder if that's just what they say when they want to be friends. I tend to miss a lot of cues, and overthink things.