I am feeling super depressed and suicidal tonight. I have a plan. I could go through with it. I won't. I'll just sleep it off and tomorrow I will wake up feeling better.

Edit: Instead of being passive aggressive have the guts to say something to me. If you don't have the guts to say something or you are worried that what you are saying is going to be too rude then it's likely you are overreacting and need to refrain from making any comments.