I honestly can't believe you people. You're constantly leaving me out. Not giving me a chance to be in my nieces lives. They aren't going to know me.

You are no better either. I told you how I felt about them leaving me out last holiday season. You said "I don't do that." Yes, yes you do. You've been doing it a lot more this year too and if I say anything at all you all fucking justify it by saying "We didn't think you'd come".

Honestly, I don't want to talk to any of you any more. You don't truly care or you wouldn't leave me out like you do. My biggest fear is that if I end up cutting you off I'll end up completely and utterly alone though and while I try and hide it; being alone terrifies me.