Hi. I'm a 14 year old freshman and need some help. All through my life, my parents wanted me to succeed. That means in life, grades, and school/social life. I mean right now i've gotten all A's and a B+ in math and i have a social life.....but i guess it's just not goo enough for my parents.
I know that they've gone though a lot too. From completely failing Spanish and other grades AND going to both a junior College/small not so great 4 year college, i can expect them to have some expectations for me and my little sister. But what they think is ok...isn't to me. They insist and keep saying over and over that I AM GOING TO A 4 YEAR COLLEGE. no choice!! I would like to go to one....i'm just stressed because of them! Of course they say that 'Im lazy' or 'I cant do anything' or that doing ART IS NOT AS IMPORTANT AS DOING HOMEWORK!!!
UHHH! i'm just so upset and filled with ALL these emotions!
I'm actually considering going into an art major because I LOVE IT!! like all my life i'v been drawing. (I even call myself a ninja doodler in class) But like always....their idea of telling me what to do is to yell at me. I've probably been yelled at more then 3 times a DAY! i never see a day where they're not 'stressed because of ME!' Like why!? why am i the one who is to blame and who is the B of the family. Im NOT!
Just because im a normal (not really) teenager doesn't make me bad or something! Just last Friday when i found out that i F the last test of Biology i freaking had a PANICK ATTACK IN MATH CLASS!! (math was next period) Not just because of what i got...but what my parents were going to say! I was so anxious and stressed that they were going to be so mad and freaking flip off the roof! I did text my mom and told her....she was ok with me going to retake it....just not how i so called acted. OK! SORRY FOR BEING UPSET BECAUSE OF YOUR BEHAVIOR TOWARDS ME!!!.....UHHHH!!! i think i've cried more times this year than any other kid in the whole world!!
.......I-i really would like to go to college.....i just wish i had it easy and that my parents would freaking understand and not think i'm blaming them....i know they love me lots....but...i feel like they almost hate me at times....like they don't think twice about my feelings or the outcome of their outburst....I so anxious and stressed and scared and also just disappointed with my life my parents and how nothing is good with me, them and my REAL reputation, my happiness and my dreams. I love art....i love my family....i just hate how i'm treated and how im expected to be like....better than anyone else in the family....nothing too artsy or stupid or not money making.....i-i just wish i was normal and that they actually act like they believe in my dreams and my feelings/thoughts.
Please help. But don't think they are mean parents there really nice....they just think im not capable of stuff and that i think im too important for anyone else or that im....just....blaming everyone else.....PS Just so you know...I was born with Tourett's Syndrome and i've always had a hard life......maybe im just the bad guy idk