Thank you for writing. I appreciate your candor.
Was it a surprise about your grandfather? Or had you known for a long time that he was super depresssed?
Depression can run in families, which has made scientists suspect there may be a genetic predisposition to it, though there's apparently more to it than that.
Medication can be great if you can find the right one that works for you.
Here's a link to a story about medication:
http://www.wingofmadness.com/depress...cal-illness-19
There may also be social issues which can exacerbate depression. Too much pressure to perform. Too much school work. Not enough quality socialization time. Not enough basic exercise. Not eating healthy. Not enough sleep. (Of course this also works the other way: depressed people tend to isolate, not exercise, eat poorly, sleep poorly. It's hard to know if these are symptoms or causes.)
It's nice to know there's a counselor and people you can talk to or write to. Staying in touch with people and just letting them know how you are can be cathartic.
For me, finding the medication that worked for me made a
huge difference. After that, I'm now able to apply other wellness techniques, such as taking brisk walks for exercise. Meditation, yoga, and similar mind-training exercises help. Having a social life and finding friends and a partner are still things I struggle with, and get depressed over sometimes.
I used to worry if I would be depressed for the rest of my life. Fortunately no. I'm fine now. Mostly fine. Definitely
much better than I was. I was seriously depressed for a very long time. Years. I eventually realized the world really wasn't as dark and gloomy as I was seeing it. The problem wasn't with the picture I was seeing, the problem was with the camera. The problem had to be with me. So I tried many different medications, and finally found one that worked great! Took a long time trying many different medications, but I guess it was worth it as I'm still around, and not in pain anymore. (Well, most of the time. I still have my roller coaster ups and downs, but overall, it doesn't hurt to be alive anymore.)
Best wishes!