Hi!
I will try to help you as much as I can, as you are really having hard time now. I will try to adress each problems you have stated.
>> my family is always fussing.
- It means so much if they are always fussing you. You would really not prefer them to not nag you at all. Your parents just want you to be closer to them: simply means they love you so much! I believe you yourself love them as much as they do, but you might feel akward to show them. Its okay, but maybe you should be more understanding that their fuss is their love to you. Remember that they are fussing you to make you a better person.
>> I'm being talked about behind my back
- Hmm, you have limited attentions to give. Why care? One thing about anxiety towards other's talk is good because you aware of other's concern about you. But when it affects you mentally, its not good anymore. I will advice you (though its not exactly good in a long run) for now, is to shut down 90% of what you hear. What you deserve now is advice and care, not critics. Critics are for you when you felt better, and critics are for you to improve yourself, so don't treat them too personally and think of it as an encouragement. If a person critize (but not pure demeaning) about you in the back, that might also mean that you need to improve on that, and show them they are wrong!
One thing social anxiety can do is to teach you how to shut yourself down to bad people, although you wont want to miss any of the really kind people in your life! (it will be adressed in the last section.)
>> my grades are failing
- I think I already told you this in the
PM. Feel free to ask me if you need.
>> my friends are becoming enemies
- Have you wondered why would this happen? Sorry because I don't have many friends in real life so I might not know how this works. But I guess it got to be a problem with trust. I can understand your struggle of how to trust a person. And it happens to me soooooooo many times. Someone who come forward to comfort me will be considered to be fake nice; someone who come to ask me for help will be thought as trying to selfishly get benefits from me; someone who claims to be busy when I just want to talk and rant to them are horrible friends who dont care about me.
And yes, all these assumptions are very true 99 out of 100 times. But do you think you should also think the same way for the remaining 1%? They are also the same kind and loving person as you are, and they are genuine friends too. I can understand why you don't trust your friend and distanting yourself from them, or maybe you had arguments with them. But sometimes you should reevaluate the whole thing: Are they the 1% that you missed? It will be a regret if you missed them, because they are the rare but kind person who were once there for you. Don't let them go away from you because you deserve them as much they deserve you!
I hope I can make you feel even a bit better. Your life might be better, and definitely can be happier than you think! Everyone here cares for you.
Best Regards,
Ivan.