[Palmolive]

Eating disorder survey
Are you Diagnosed with an Eating disorder? Yes
If so what are you diagnosed with? EDNOS and Bulimia
If not what eating disorder do you think you fit the most? N/A
Do you have any other mental health issues(Diagnoses): Yes
If so what are they? Borderline Personality Disorder, Depressive Episodes, PTSD, Psychotic Episodes, OCD tendencies
Do you self-harm? Yes
If so what age did you start? 8/9
was it because of your eating disorder? No. I didn't struggle with my eating then

What age did your eating disorder start? Probably at 12
How old are you know? 22
How many years have you struggled? With ED's, for ten years. In general for 13 years
How does it interfere with your life or how did it interfere with your life? I get anxious about eating in public and infront of people I don't know so avoid it. I have an unhealthy relationship with food (starving, binging, purging), I've been at low weights and had many vitamin deficiencies. It makes me tired. It has reflux problems which I am on medication for. Mentally, it feels like torture at times. I hate the way I look. I feel bad about myself. I feel ugly and feel I deserve the pain I put myself through with it. I get distressed when I eat and feel bad for it and so on.

What does your eating disorder do for you or what did it do? It makes me feel in control.
Have you been in treatment for eating disorders? When I was on a DBT rehab secure ward, I was nearly tube fed and had to go on diet plans and the staff had to keep a record of my daily intake of food and fluids.
If so how many times? I have never been hospitalised purely for eating but it's been as issue the 14 times I have been inpatient.
Did it seems to help you? To be honest, I didn't eat for a long time and when I was told they were going to put me in general hospital for treatment, I slowly began eating. The thought of having no control of what would be going in to me, scared me enough to slowly make me begin eating again. I have however, never found seeing dietitians helpful.
Are you in therapy for your eating disorder? It is part of my "treatment".
If so what exactly is your game plan? To get back into a healthy eating pattern
Do you want recovery? Sometimes. I mean. Yes. I don't want to live with this, but sometimes it feels like I can't live with out it. I don't know if that makes sense.
What would recovery look like for you? To be a healthy weight but also to be able to challenge my disordered thoughts around food and eating and my body image more so that I can eat healthily again.