[Celyn]

It does sound like something difficult that you are trying to figure out. You're right that learning what he went through may have helped to explain a little of why he didn't respect your boundaries and yet at the same time, knowing that it's no excuse. It also can be difficult when it's in the heat of the moment....is it worth talking to him again and trying to establish boundaries and rules before any future intimate situations?

I'm glad to hear that he had counselling. It does sound like he is doing well for what he went through, although while many people can go on to achieve and succeed in education, jobs etc., they may still have emotional or mental health struggles at times. I think in male rape survivors there is more of a stigma attached to what they went through, and statistically they are less likely to speak out and get help, meaning they may appear to be 'fine' on the outside, but may be struggling internally. So I think it's a good sign that the guy went for counselling!

There really are a lot less resources for males, unfortunately. I think the organisation 1 in 6 might be a good starting point though.