[Kate*]

And, we're back... Ironically enough, the first appointment they offered me was first thing tomorrow morning. It was,doable, but less than ideal; and since I'm not in immediate crisis, I thought someone else may need it more. Lack of empathy my ass.

If good things worth fighting for were coming, I'd consider it, but they only get worse from here and I have the ultimate proof that I'm doomed to the worst of the worst outcomes being reserved for only me. My disability isn't a self-fulfilling prophecy. I don't fail because I believe I will, I fail because I'm broken and I've learned to expect nothing else.Even when something "never happens", I'll be the unlucky one. I even said in my first days that it wouldn't happen to me and yet, here we are. I fucking quit. I can work my ass off harder than everyone else, or I can save the energy and do nothing, same result. Actually, in this case, I would've been a lot better off if I had never bothered.

Not everyone with this has a good quality or a successful life, that's what people are worried about. If it were genetic, we can't assume our kids who inherit it would be okay! I wouldn't wish what it's put me through on my worst enemy. No need to rub your success in my face.

It's not ASD and there is NO proof that it's genetic. That's one of the ways they differ. One of the things I can't stand about people with this: They all talk like they know everything when they have no clue what they're talking about! I'm officially sorry to anybody I've ever done that to, it's a huge pain in the ass.