[Kate*]

Everyone I know is making a living helping people somehow, and I'm never allowed near people despite wanting and working for it just as much, if not more. I hate my life.

And we're back, but I saw this coming. At least I got to feel amazing for a few days. If only I could have a life I wanted, but it's impossible. I'd feel better about trying that if I didn't have to borrow the money from them. They gave me SO much that got WASTED that I feel too guilty. But it's not like I can find a job and pay for it myself. Maybe that's not the answer after all, but if not that, what?! It's been almost 2 years! It's time to move on with something else, but there's nothing. This is why I want to quit because the terror of not being prepared for the future and the fact that my nightmare could easily become reality are too much.

HOW does it never occur to you that your neighbors need sleep?! 2 days in a row and NO ONE ELSE is doing it right now. But, since you're already at it, can you do ours too? SHUT UP. I would feel better if I could sleep this off, but NO. I'm doing that eventually, I swear to God.