[Kate*]

Hey Leo, Welcome to TH

One of the difficult things about being in a relationship (any relationship, but especially a romantic one) is understanding where the other person is coming from and in a lot of cases, supporting someone through difficult times while not letting it affect you too much.

The bottom line is that you can't be solely responsible for another person's happiness or well-being. If her reliance on you is affecting you this much, then you have a right to put up a boundary and decide how much and how often you're willing to take this on. Also, assuming she has depression and has stopped her medication, that may have something to do with it; it certainly doesn't help. Regardless of your view of medication for depression, some people rely on it, and it should only be stopped under medical supervision with the approval of a treating professional. Maybe suggest that she try the school counselor. I could understand if she's hesitant to, since professional help hasn't been much help, but you're right that there's only so much you can do for her. You can love her and want her to be happy and healthy without making it your responsibility to get her there.