[Kate*]

Assuming you stick to your story that I did "nothing wrong", then I have NOTHING to be ashamed of, and you probably do. That doesn't mean I don't care if you know what this has done to me. This still screwed me, you're still not innocent, and I still want what I can never have, but at least I'm not ashamed anymore (unless you lied to me), but even then, that's on you, not me.

I still desperately want what I will never have. My broken brain and you stole that from me. I hope it either works out another way or I eventually come to terms with it. Either way I REALLY wish you you knew what this has done to me.

I know I have to let go, but I had so much done and my alternatives are so bad (or non-existent) that I just can't. And for the record, I was this much of a wreck before I knew about that so this IS NOT a self-fulfilling prophesy and I DID NOT cause or choose it. You've forgotten about me and I know that so I have to let go of it and you, but it's too painful.