[BreathingIn]

( I don't know whether this should go in the Mental Health topic or Family, either way it can be moved if needed )

I'm in my early 20's and a college graduate. I have applied endlessly for jobs, ones I was sure I'd be good at, but I keep getting turned down. I'm beginning to apply for waitress jobs in the meantime until I find something in my field of degree.

But my family set a job up for me stocking groceries. Before going any further, you should know that my family controls my life. They always criticize what I'm doing, where I go, what I wear, etc... They yell at me for how I feel. For example, my mom walks like an elephant and when I tell her to walk quietly she gets very mad and says "You're crazy! You need help!".

When I told them I'm applying for waitress jobs, they put that down and say "You don't want to do that" and list everything that's bad about it.

Basically, everything I think about, they list everything that's wrong and offer their opinions and tell me I need to listen to them for the best.

It has gotten to the point that I feel like I have a mental disability, possibly retardation, because they have made me feel extremely incapable of making decisions for myself. It has gotten extremely bad because I second guess everything I do and end up not doing anything at all. I was very excited to apply for a couple waitress jobs this week, but since they put it down, I'm thinking that I'm stupid and don't know what I'm doing.

I graduated high school and college and did all my work on my own. I've had several internships. But when my family is in the picture, I feel like they treat me as if I have a mental disability and can't do anything for myself. My mom even insists she makes my bed because she says I can't do it right.

Growing up I felt I was retarded because I didn't have many friends. I felt like I was treated in the same manner that a classmate with severe mental retardation had. They ignored her and laughed at her behind her back. They did the same to me. No one wanted to be around me.

I don't know what to do anymore. I've talked to a school counselor for a long time and everything points towards that I'm fine. But my family is making me feel like I'm not mentally capable of doing things on my own. I don't know what to do. How do I know if there's something actually wrong with me or if it's my family?