|
Re: Say something you wish you could say to their face. -
March 8th 2015, 01:57 AM
You would have been 24 today.... looking at your Facebook page made me cry. You were one of the most alive people there ever was, I still have to shake myself and remember that you're not here any more.
With my happy birthday message I posted 'Fans' by Kings of Leon on your wall - it reminds me of you, because in that brief little time seven years ago when we were talking on MSN every day and flirting in school and both waiting for something to happen between us, we used to sing that song. Or just type 'Homegrown', and we'd be off. Hah. I wish I could see those conversations now.
I don't want to pretend that we were still close - that I'd ever been more than a very friendly acquaintance since our briefest of teenage flings - I know there were people who saw you and loved you every day, and to me you were, really, just one of those people you always wish you hadn't screwed it up with, even years later. But I started wondering if you'd get the song reference, if you'd comment on it with something cheeky - before I remembered that no, you obviously wouldn't... you're dead.
As I got off the bus today I remembered one time that I saw you on my bus - I think you may have been sleeping - and I didn't go over and say hi.
Why didn't I?
Honey, you're familiar, like my mirror, years ago ..... I slithered here from Eden just to sit outside your door ... ... Níl a shíltear mar a bhítear. Things are not always what they seem.
|