dealing with guilt on top of depression -
January 2nd 2015, 07:29 PM
I got my friend a box of lotions & bath salts as a late Christmas/New Years present. My mom told me that that didn't seem like a good gift, or that it wasn't "enough." Not that any of this matters but while I don't have a job, my friend does have a job, and so at this point this is all I could get her. Also, we're renting a tiny apartment in which I don't even have a room and don't have a lot of money to be spending so I thought my gift was thoughtful enough for what I have.
But my mom then comes up to me and takes the lotion & perfume she got for ME and insisted I give that to my friend as well.
Long story short, I didn't give her my present. I'm usually a very giving person but this was something I really really liked, especially because it was from my grandma. As weird as it sounds, every time my grandma gets me something I feel an instant connection to the item, even if it's lotion.
So I want to give her the thing I got her. Is that sinful or hurting God?
And now will it be wrongful of me to use the lotions my grandma got me for myself? I will forever feel horrible. I also want to add that the reason I feel guilt or that God is mad at me is because I feel like I am being extremely materialistic and selfish and that God would want me to give my things, even though I may be the "less fortunate" one. I've seen homeless men give their things away and so now I feel like a total jerk.
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