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Re: My girlfriend Lucy -
December 22nd 2014, 12:33 AM
Hey, Georgina. 
This is really heartwarming that you care so much about Lucy that you're posting here about how to help, along with spending lots of time reading about the disorder. That shows you care a lot about her which she probably appreciates a lot.
Something that's concerning is the fact that she self-diagnosed herself with anorexia. Sometimes disorders and conditions can be obvious, but still, self-diagnosing can have its dangers that she may not fully realize. For instance, click here to read this article about the dangers of self-diagnosis. I'm not saying she doesn't have anorexia at all as I don't know her, and the fact that she stops eating is a pretty big warning sign.
The fact that you're there for her and she calls you for comfort is support that she probably really appreciates. Along with the fact that you never force her to eat. But, anorexia can become serious and she does need to reach out for help at some point because it's pretty hard to win against anorexia without professional help. Have you tried encouraging her again to talk to someone like the school guidance counselor, a therapist, or opening up to someone like her parents? She has to be willing to choose recovery to truly get help and want to recover.
Have you asked her why she doesn't want to see a doctor? There may be more specific reasons behind it and if she told you, you might could help reassure her about whatever concerns she has. I realize she doesn't want to see a doctor or anything, but she seems to really be struggling and I think if she found the right therapist that specializes in eating disorders that it could really help her. You could reassure her that you'll still be right there with her supporting her through this.
When she does eat, acknowledge it and let her know you're proud of her for doing so. Anorexia can make the simple task of eating really difficult, so it's best to reinforce the idea that eating is a good thing. Little things like letting her know you're proud of her and happy when she eats could end up being positive for her.
You're a really great boyfriend to be helping her through this. By just being there for her and being supportive, you're helping her a lot more than you think. Don't doubt how much you do for her, and also in the meantime, make sure that you're also taking care of yourself, okay? I know you really wanna help your girlfriend, but you have to make sure you look after yourself too because you matter as well! I hope your girlfriend chooses recovery and begins doing better. You're welcome to message me if you need someone to talk to. Seeing your significant other suffer can feel really heartbreaking, so I'm happy to listen if you need.
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