[Always *]

You shouldn't have to compromise your future because she isn't willing to separate your bank accounts. I think what you need to do is at least do that much to start with. I think you need to be clear with her that you are unwilling to put her in the position where she has to take on your debt now that your financial situation has changed. It is causing her an undue amount of stress and that you are not willing to negotiate there. She can't hold you back by refusing to reliqinquish the control she has by keeping your money with hers - if you have to, you could always go to the bank and find out what the process would be to separate your bank accounts. They deal with stuff like that all the time and will probably have a process in place.

You have a right to want to keep going to school and if that is your priority right now then that is your right to choose. You need your education. I don't think you need to choose between her and the education, but obviously a few things need to change in your relationship so that your financial strains and depression won't have to become hers too.