[nothereanymore]

My throat tightens and I can't speak
My heart skips every other beat
I tremble inside, from my hands to my feet
I bite my lips to keep it in.

Negative mantras play in my head
"You're stupid", "You're ugly", "You're better off dead"
No wonder they like her instead
I'm dying in my own skin.

I cannot step out of the house for fear
In my room, my worries can't reach me here
Even if they really DO think I'm weird,
They're not around to tell me so.

I never want to go back outside
A place I cannot speak my mind
My mouth just won't work sometimes
My selfish anxiety won't let me go.