[Ashleylovesyou]

I completely agree with this. I want to add something though. Something like rape (especially if it is recent) can make sex difficult, for both partners. She may not be ready to have sex, and may try to hide it. There also may be times where she has flashback before, during, or after having sex. So if you two plan on becoming/are having sex she may have flashbacks. This does not mean she thinks you are capable of this, or has problems trusting you. Remember, it is most likely the act that is causing the flashback and it will take time for her to overcome this.

This was an issue with my ex boyfriend and I. It was hard for him to understand that he wasn't the problem, it was just having sex that was the problem for me.

Try your best to understand this, and if it does happen please, for the sake of her emotions, do not overreact. Just try to listen, and be there for her. I trust you will seek help for yourself if it becomes too difficult for you to cope with.

Originally Posted by Idyllic.

Hey there.

Firstly, you are a really good boyfriend for being concerned and for wanting to help her.

Was she raped recently? If so, she should go to a gynecologist to get checked out to make sure she's okay physically. Survivors of abuse are associated with feelings of great embarrassment, shame, and feelings of being dirty or impure. She might not be comfortable opening up to you completely about this yet. Just remind her that you're there for her, and encourage her to seek help. Also, look for signs of other affects such as PTSD or self-harm.

When being there for her, remember to take care of yourself too, okay? Take some time out to think and to accept that this happened to your girlfriend. If you're feeling overwhelmed, take a walk or confide in someone you trust so you don't have to bottle this inside.

Let me know if you want to talk.