[YoungK9]

So, tomorrow I go to my therapist for non-related reasons.
I really want to tell someone,but I can never get myself to tell someone,/I always make up excuses for not telling her tell myself "next time", or I don't need to tell, & other excuse. Then I always get scared to tell my therapist, & I can never get myself to tell. So, if someone has pointer on telling her, that would be wonderful.

I have been suffering with depression for almost two years. It just isn't getting better. I'm just keep on going downhill, & nothing seems to be getting better. I usually am depressed most of day, sometimes all of the day. I don't know when I was happy last. It just sucks. I can't even have fun anymore, I do not enjoy anything anymore, I really don't have a joy in my life. Which just makes me more depressed. My depression just makes so exhaust doing the littlest thing takes a lot of work. A huge reason why I am not motivated to do my homework, or anything for school.

Because of my depression, & who severe it can get. I have suicidal thoughts. They just aren't thoughts, I am actually contemplating suicide. Whenever something goes bad I want to kill myself, & go through with my plan. I have "researched" methods(that was a month or two ago). Somedays, It can be so hard to make it though out the day, I don't know if I can make.

If I tell her I am dealing with depression, but I don't say anything about wanting to kill myself: Will she have to tell anyone? Or will it stay confidential?
What will she do if I tell her?

Now, If I told her about my suicidal thoughts, & that I did have a plan: What she have to do? Does anyone have to know?