[bitesize]

It doesn't feel real that we've broken up. Because until the end we were still clinging on to each other and telling each other I Love You and we're going to have to support each other through this it doesn't feel like a break up. I don't know what it feels like. Last night I couldn't bear to think of all the things I loved about you and this morning it doesn't hurt as much and I wore your hoodie to bed. It hasn't really hit me yet and I'm really scared of when it will. I've no idea how we're going to cope with this. I'm scared to have to start telling people because then it will be real. I'm scared of the day I have a free evening and no one's around and I'll realise I can't see you any more. Usually when I break up with someone I would get with someone else but I can't even think about that right now. It's funny how a few days I could fantasise about getting with someone from work and not feel guilty and now the thought of it is sickening. I know that there's going to be some really tough days and I honestly don't know how this is going to happen. The thought of you crying as much as we both were last night is the most painful thing in the world right now. I can't stand the thought of not spending time with your dog. I'm scared to tell my parents and my friends or change my relationship status because I don't know if people reactions will break me. Today my throat is sore and my head is fuzzy and I don't know if this is some sort of weird reaction to not feeling my emotions. We've never been friends before so I can't imagine how we're going to go about this. Like I said I'm just terrified of the moment that this is all going to hit me.