A few months ago I began dating a man I have known for several years, but we just never encountered the opportunity to go out until then. This man is much older than I am; he is actually in his early fifties. Now for me, this isn't a problem. I've always been less about age and more about the person: as long as there is physical attraction to one another and compatibility in other key areas of life, I have no problem with dating someone, and he satisfies these criteria. Things are going really well with this person, and there has been discussion of, if things continue going really well, us progressing to a more serious "boyfriend/girlfriend" type relationship. However, one of the things he asked me is if, should things get serious down the road, I would be comfortable introducing him to my parents.

I have so far been adamant that he not meet my parents. For one, it's a casual relationship. I am polyamorous, and decided a while back that my parents do not need to meet my more casual partners, when and if I have any. But most importantly would be his age. He is just a few years younger than my parents. Even though he is a wonderful, intelligent, caring and funny man, I don't think they would see past his age. I've had experience with them rejecting partners in the past. Even though at those times they had good reason to (I used to date some rather unsavory characters), the stress of those times has really stuck with me over the years since then, and I'd rather avoid dealing with it. I live with my parents, which is why this is such a big issue.

I don't really want to introduce him to them, but it's obviously important to him. I just don't know how I would make them see past the fact that he's so much older than me. I'm worried they will make assumptions about my judgment, but worse, assumptions about how honorable his intentions might be. When my mom realized the new person I am seeing smokes cigarettes, she told me that "You could do better." And that judgment was just because he smokes, without knowing anything else about him. It was actually rather hurtful and insulting, and it really makes me worry about him meeting them.

So how would I go even about introducing him? No matter what I would say or do I just have trouble seeing it being a non-stressful event for me.