[Kate*]

--It's clear that it's a struggle for you, I hope you can do what you need to do to get it under control. I wish I could help you with it, but it would be unethical and cross boundaries.

---Same except I will add that i hope you can feel better about yourself too because it really seems to affect you emotionally more than it does him.

---To both: I know someone who died from complications of this, I couldn't help him either. I hate feeling helpless. I'm going to be a PROFESSIONAL HELPER for crying out loud! How do you move on when you are powerless to help someone, or if they don't want your help and you have to watch bad things happen to them? And while we're at it, how do you deal with transference?