[Captain1628]

I think that you should live your life the way you want to. As long as you're a good person, religion or whether you believe in God doesn't matter. Life is too short to worry about these things and I know that it's hard not to because like you said, you were raised in that environment. But why live your life miserably to try and get into something that is uncertain (heaven)? But what is certain is the moment that you live in right now. No matter what we believe or think there will always be someone in the world that will tell us that it is wrong. Such as homosexuality. But these decisions you have to make yourself. If it feels wrong to you and brings you down, then don't do it. As you go through life, you will learn new things and understand things better. Your views now may change and of course they might not. But it's okay to think differently, it doesn't mean that you're wrong. I know that it sounds cheesy and cliched, but life is too short. You have to live life for the happiness of yourself and the ones you love, all the while being a kind and good-hearted person. Which I'm sure you are.