[juanx]

Sadness,lonelyness,abandonned,hurt,pain,addiction, hate,self hate,alone,pushed away,don't want to talk to me,looking right thru me,unloveable,pretend to be happy all the time,I have tried to kill myself more than once,I hate my life but nobody cares,self harm,hate me,screaming but no one can hear,over time,hurting myself has become easier than sorting out my problems.it hurts but its ok I'm used to it......things I've found in my journal after writing all my emotions down,well not all of it.these are reasons why I don't want to wake in the morning cause I know that on that same night ill be sitting in my room thinking,crying....cutting.....I know I want to stop but I can not find a good reason to do so,I want to change,sometimes I wish I had a life of someone else,cause now I feel useless,unwanted and all the things above