[Kate*]

Just as I thought, you're an attention-seeker who thinks you know everything when you really know NOTHING. I don't apply that label lightly either. Why don't you LEARN about something before commenting on it. I'm just sorry that people will listen to you because you're WRONG!

Will someone please remind me why the hell I wanted to do this? All I can see happening is this going to hell in a handbasket while I end up worse than I would've been if I had just kept my damn mouth shut. If he's available I can at least ask him for that (and about that), but unless she wants to bring him in or ask him about it, I'm not bothering him with this AGAIN. After the innocent e-mail I sent her, I have a clue as to how this is going to go and I just want to not do it, but I know I need to. What if I'm afraid for good reason? What if I really don't belong here? Or what if I'm just being paranoid? I don't know what to believe anymore. Can I rewind to last June and start everything over?

I was NOT being paranoid, I AM 2 seconds from being thrown out of here for the same thing that got me last time, and she's harder about that then even the bitch was. Meeting with Dr. M again tomorrow (even though I swore I wouldn't waste his time with this again). I feel like I'm waiting for someone to look me in the eye and tell me to get out, but the second they do it, my whole world collapses. I don't know what to believe anymore. And I forgot an envelope for this, more points off for me, not that I can afford it. At least he doesn't make me want to cry, so I can get through tomorrow without wanting to do something that will act as proof that I really don't belong here.