[hocus pocus]

I'm sitting here in so much pain. I'm shaking and I think my heart is breaking into a million pieces. I go through this every night because of you. Because you did things to me; and you made me do things to you that make me feel like a fucking slut. You ruined things for me, you really did. I fucking hate you. You made me distrust most of the people in my life. I can pretend like it didn't happen during the day, but at night, all odds are off. I cry and suppress screams and cut myself. Physical flashbacks that should never have had to be there. How can you pretend like you didn't do this? Doesn't this just eat away at you?