[TaraMarie]

Here is the story of my depression and my struggle with it and the thoughts of suicide..i hope my achievements will help or teach anyone who reads this.

I feel like I was born with this depression sense I can remember I have always had it. My mom.. I never met she died giving birth to me and a part me hates myself for it. My dad a drinker and a druggy and highly abusive didn't help with my struggle even my brother couldn't help me. I found cutting helped me with the stress I was under.

Most of the people I have met in my life have used, cheated and abused me after meeting a good foster family and getting the treatment I needed I found my first love which ended badly at that point I found comfort in drinking

After the emotional and mental abuse from my second bf I lost it drinking and cutting and hating everything...


My struggle lasted years and way more painful then reading anything that I type. But I know this I'm not the only one and it's not something that will go away or something that can be faked depression is real...painful and it effects everything around you.

I have stopped drinking I'm a year sober and happy cutting.. I'm still struggling with everyday the depression that it always with me is the hardest struggle I have ever had to make it drains me makes me so tired.

If I had to speak in front of people to help them I would say this....

*Depression is a physical, mental, and emotional struggle that over 80% of people struggle with daily. It's not something that can be helped. Even though you have friends and family medication and possibly a therapist.. I'm sorry and many of you know its not good enough.. it helps but its not enough.. because we need to help ourselves to stand up and say enough that we have had enough and heal smiling takes a lot but.. still do it smile and see if you keep smiling everyday then someday you will see that the smile says*