Dude! That is so disrespectful! What makes you think that's even a little bit acceptable? It's one thing to say "I don't believe that." It's another to deliberately and with explicit language insult another person's beliefs. That is so not classy.
Mary: the answers to all your questions from a religious standpoint are, of course, because G-d wanted it to be so. (That's the standard answer to pretty much every religious question, lol.) That's if you're taking a literal interpretation, where G-d has a hand in everything and every word of the Torah is literal truth. If you don't believe that G-d can do anything, then there's no reason to take every word as literal truth and it becomes an embellished, inspiring story where the message, not the details are important.