She remembers the past
When she closes her eyes.
All the tears she never shed.
All the times they said she was fine.
When is it OK to cry?
You never let her in the past.
It hurt her inside.
Are tears so wrong
Shed by a child
Who's been so painfully wronged?
The soul of the child
Is torn in two
Wanting to cry
But wanting her parents' love, too.
"Don't cry."
The parents said.
"You're just a child. You have nothing to cry about."
What she felt, they said, was wrong.
And, for her, they know what's right.
So confusion set in and the girl's feeling, eventually, were gone
And numbness took their place.
That girl grew up feeling cold and dead
With not much to say
And a heart full of dread.
I am the girl. Growing up, my parents always told me not to cry, that I have things easy since I'm a child so I have no reason to cry. I was hurt and they told me I wasn't. I was sad and they said I was being dramatic. I was so confused. They'd tell me that my own feelings and experiences were wrong. They told me I wasn't allowed to cry, but let my older sister and little brother could. What makes me so different from them? Why is it just me? I still can't understand why, though I try to.