[Ali Baba]

So that's it, after nearly five years, that's how it ends? I'm really disappointed in you, I never thought you'd behave like that towards anyone, let alone me.

In retrospect we weren't good for each other, I just feel like a total knob for not realising sooner. I was so blind to it all. This time last year I would've rather died than imagine my life without you, I can't believe I had the strength to initiate "the end" but I'm glad I did. I want to continue being friendly towards you, because you were such a huge part of my life for so long, but don't take it as a chance I'll take you back, because you and I both know how deeply you betrayed me and you know I'll never forget that.

I know you spread that lie about me too, which was ridiculously childish but I forgive you, we all do stupid shit when we're hurting, I just wish it didn't have to be so bullshitty. If you weren't so immature I think it would have worked better but I need someone who isn't so naive and unrealistic and honestly they way you dealt with it all makes me so sure you're not the right person for me.

I know it hasn't all been bad. You taught me to lighten up, enjoy the moment and forget about my past for a while and I'll always be appreciative of that. You were the first person I ever loved and I'll never forget you but you reaffirmed my inability to trust people and I can't help but think all the great things you said to me were bullshit. Open wounds will heal in time but they usually leave scars, I hope that's not what I remember you by....

On a serious note, I know you have a tendency to get depressed and suicidal when things go bad, I hope you know that I'll always be there for you if you really need me, regardless. I told you I'd be there for you forever and I really mean it. I just need time to get over how much you hurt me. I really hope you have a happy life and that you achieve everything you've ever wanted and more, but I'm really strangely happy I won't be a part of it.