[Kate*]

Hi Sam, you've been gone 6 years today (for some reason I thought it was yesterday?!), but you know that already. I miss you and I really wish you were still here. I figured out, other than your food and your personality, what made me like you. You Saw Me, my dad's other friends just talked to him and ignored me while I sat quietly in the corner of a booth and I felt like they put up with me because I had to come with him. I could count on you including me in the conversation or at least checking on me every so often to make sure I knew that you realized I was important too. When I was there and happened to be sick, you were the first to check on me, my dad had been with me for a week and hadn't noticed. I miss that so much, I have a TON I wish I could tell you. I used to be too afraid to tell you things because I was intimidated by your size and your personality, but I have a TON to tell you now. I always felt like, if you didn't have to tell my dad, I could've spilled my guts to you. When the depression set in, when I wanted to die, I felt like I REALLY wanted to tell you, like you would've understood. When you asked me questions and talked to me, I felt like you really cared and like what I had to say was important to you. I felt like maybe you were going through some of the same thing, maybe I'm wrong about that, I felt like you were in pain, like you were suffering somehow and i wanted to help you SO bad and there was nothing I could do. I know I've told you a million times, but I'm getting my masters in counseling and I want to help overweight people, in part because of you. I hate everything that you're missing because that's just me and sometimes I would give anything just to have a conversation with you just because I can't and because I know I mattered to you.