Relationships and Dating Ask here for advice on dates, break-ups and other relationship concerns.
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Should I send my boyfriend this web address on how to treat your girlfriend? -
January 3rd 2012, 01:32 AM
My boyfriend acts like I don't exist or that I don't matter to him. He never texts me, calls me, sends me messages on Facebook or Steam, or asks me to hang out. I always have to do this if I want to see him. Even before we were going out and he had a crush on me, he acted this way. The only reason we got together is because of me.
I've talked to him about this and it hasn't made a lasting difference. Once a few weeks ago when I was upset with him, he told me that he knows he's not a very good boyfriend (he's inexperienced with girls) and that he wants me to tell him what to do to get better. So I told him that I wanted him to message me and ask me to hang out more often because this really bothers me. He did nothing. About a week ago, during a date I asked him again. Nothing.
I'm thinking about giving up on this guy. I really like him but I deserve better. But before I do anything like that, I found an interesting little page on the Internet about how to treat your girlfriend. I figure it's pretty accurate for how I want to be treated. This is the link:
http://revortay1.hubpages.com/hub/10-Ways-to-Make-Your-Girlfriend-Feel-Special
Anyway, I was wondering if it would be appropriate to send him this link, or if it would be totally rude or what... and if it would even make a difference. Thanks.
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Re: Should I send my boyfriend this web address on how to treat your girlfriend? -
January 3rd 2012, 01:50 AM
First of all, I don't think it would be rude at all to send him this. Honestly, he's the one being rude by not thinking about your feelings. He's your boyfriend, and he should want you to be happy.
Second, from what you wrote about him, I'm not sure it will make much of a difference, to be honest. Whether or not you give up on him is your choice, but considering you've tried in the past to make him pay more attention to you I don't think he's going to change soon. In the end it's all up to you.
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Re: Should I send my boyfriend this web address on how to treat your girlfriend? -
January 3rd 2012, 02:29 AM
I think it's a waste of your time, to be blunt.
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Re: Should I send my boyfriend this web address on how to treat your girlfriend? -
January 3rd 2012, 02:58 AM
I'm going to have to agree with Lissa. You've tried to get his attention in the past, and he's done nothing. Sending him this link probably wouldn't make a different either.
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Re: Should I send my boyfriend this web address on how to treat your girlfriend? -
January 3rd 2012, 03:52 AM
To reiterate Lissa and Shannon, even from a male perspective I would just leave. What's a relationship without communication?
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Re: Should I send my boyfriend this web address on how to treat your girlfriend? -
January 3rd 2012, 04:28 AM
Well, you could send him the link. But I can practically guarantee that it will not achieve anything. Why? Because your boyfriend already knows how he should be treating you. He already knows that he should be talking to you, messaging you, asking you out. In fact, he probably knew that before you even told him (I doubt any guy is stupid enough to think that they don't need to talk to their girlfriend to be a good boyfriend). The fact is that he clearly does not care about you enough to be a good boyfriend.
Break up with him now. Everything you've said just screams that this guy does not want to be your boyfriend, but is either too lazy or too much of a coward to actually end the relationship. You said yourself that you deserve better. So prove it by standing up for yourself and leaving the relationship.
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Re: Should I send my boyfriend this web address on how to treat your girlfriend? -
January 3rd 2012, 07:53 AM
I agree, there really is no point in sending it. I think just talking to him about it would be more effective. If that doesn't work, then its time to find someone who will treat you right.
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Re: Should I send my boyfriend this web address on how to treat your girlfriend? -
January 3rd 2012, 06:43 PM
As a guy, I can tell you that the link is going to be pretty much useless. Unless he has psychological issues about vulnerability, then he already knows the concept of being in a relationship. The problem is that he doesn't really apply it. Sending him the link will only reiterate what he already knows. Like they say, you can lead a mule to water, but you can't force it to drink. It seems that he's having commitment issues. Maybe he feels that you're still just a crush, and sometimes crushes are better off not dating because they're not near as compatible as we think they are. The best advice I can offer is that you need to have a serious talk with him. You like him, he's not putting forth any effort, and if he's not willing to put any effort into the relationship then the relationship isn't working out. It's not your responsibility to research how to be a better boyfriend; I've been dating my girlfriend for 8 months, and I'm still always researching ways to better our relationship (even if it's very strong). If he cares, he'll do something about it. If not, then you gotta find someone who is willing to commit.
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Re: Should I send my boyfriend this web address on how to treat your girlfriend? -
January 3rd 2012, 09:05 PM
I think instead of sending him this link, talk to him yourself. It'll clear the air and make you feel better. You want to be able to get stuff off your chest yourself. I hope things work out for you
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Re: Should I send my boyfriend this web address on how to treat your girlfriend? -
January 8th 2012, 12:27 AM
If he doesn't accept you, and treat you how you would want a man to treat you, I say dump that trash and move on.
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Re: Should I send my boyfriend this web address on how to treat your girlfriend? -
January 8th 2012, 12:31 AM
I honestly don't think this relationshup is worth it. He isn't making you feel loved or appreciated in any way, he hasn't been making any effort at all and doesn't know how to treat women so it's best you find someone who can treat you better. You can't be happy in a relationship where he ignores you all the time and doesn't work on it with you. It takes two people to make a relationship work.
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Member
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Re: Should I send my boyfriend this web address on how to treat your girlfriend? -
January 8th 2012, 04:04 AM
Hi everyone. Thanks for all the replies! I ended up talking to him and it turns out he was under a lot of pressure recently. I think things are going to work out though.
Thanks ^^
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