Female Advice Preferred: Could this work?

[Warachia]

Well I know I've been posting here recently, but anyways..

I'm trying to figure out ways to get girls attracted to me at youth group, without going up to them and starting a conversation..

Since my "dance session" probably make people think different and made me more well-known..

I thought of something like just getting a bottle of water from the vending machine and giving it to one of the girls, if the offer is rejected, just give it to a different girl and just walk away, don't say anything..

Or..

Ask one of them how my shirt looks and depending on the situation, mumble something like "nice shoes" and when she asks me to repeat what I said, just say "Well, you're gonna have to follow me to find out."

Or
-Just sing Frank Sinatra's "Blue Moon" up on stage(karaoke?)
-Dance up on stage
-Play on the piano(of course, it's out of tune)
-Sing "My Funny Valentine" up on stage, when it's getting close to the 14th.

Just ideas, really..

[Disappearing]

If you're willing to do all those things up on stage up in front of people, then it may be a good idea for you to just go up to a girl you like, and compliment her. That can help you start a nice conversation.

[leavemealone]

Don't compliment her shoes; try complimenting her eyes, that means more and she'll feel like your not just trying to start a conversation. To me, it seems like getting on stage is a little too much? Just say hi, and tell her her eyes are pretty! She'll LOVE that; girls always love when guys say something sweet about their eye color.

[Warachia]

Well..

Although the "complimenting the eyes" would do okay, just something simple like just giving a bottle of water should work..

[Harmony♥]

Complimenting the eyes will work better than complementing her shoes. A girl likes confidence, and if she sees you lowering your head to stare at the ground, or anywhere else but her face, she's going to view you as insecure or unsure of yourself. Look in her eyes and make eye contact, and keep it! Compliment the color of her eyes, or the way she smiles. A girl wants to be noticed for what you should be looking at all the time, not a pair of shoes. It's so impersonal.

[Eternal]

I'm a little confused. If you are brave enough to do all of those things on stage to get attention, then why can't you just talk to the girls? Its a lot easier to have a conversation with someone then to go up and perform in front of them.

[Warachia]

Because that's just me.

I want the girls to chase me and I want to be memorable.

Complementing their eyes won't make me memorable, because that's too common.

Standing outside of the pack will make the girls remember me

[Acheron]

I have to disagree with complimenting a girl at all, let alone on her eyes. By starting a conversation that way, it creates a frame in which you are saying nice things to her in order to win her approval. That's not a good thing: successful frames are those in which she tries to win your approval.

While it may be appropriate to compliment her later in a conversation, you should still avoid the eyes. Hugely cliched. In fact, avoid anything physical, and focus on something she's done well or some aspect of her personality. Makes her feel like you're assessing her on more than just her looks.

Oh, and don't buy things for girls as an opener. Makes it look like you're trying to buy their affection, and while they might keep you around for being a pushover, they won't respect you.

[Gaia]

As much as it pains me to do so, but I agree with Acheron. On most of his post.
I do have some questions for you though!
Is there a specific girl you like? Or is this purely to get any girl interested in you?
You've got the right idea of standing out of the pack, but remember that a little arrogance/self confidence is good, too much is killer. Never, for the love of god, act like you're better than them. It's allll about equality, they have to be interested in you just as much as you're interested in them for it to have a good chance of success.
I'm not always big on the complimenting, sure it's nice and all, but what's better is if a guy actually pays attention and seems interested. But then again, I'm far too old to be game playing any more, perhaps this still works on the 'younsters'

And on a final note, if you are going for the complimenting route then make it personal to her, if you like something about her looks/outfit/personality specifically then tell her, and explain why. It'll make her blush, if you do it right

[Warachia]

Purely to get any girl interested in me.

[Teddy Bear]

Originally Posted by Acheron

I have to disagree with complimenting a girl at all, let alone on her eyes. By starting a conversation that way, it creates a frame in which you are saying nice things to her in order to win her approval. That's not a good thing: successful frames are those in which she tries to win your approval.

While it may be appropriate to compliment her later in a conversation, you should still avoid the eyes. Hugely cliched. In fact, avoid anything physical, and focus on something she's done well or some aspect of her personality. Makes her feel like you're assessing her on more than just her looks.

Hey Acheron, I kinda agree with your post, but I think what we're trying to figure out is how to get the girl to want his approval in the first place. Playing hard to get with a girl that doesn't want you to begin with won't work very well.

[Chris]

I think that maybe you should just not do anything with the girls at all. WHAT? I know, sounds weird, but follow me real quick.

So you go into the room, start chatting with the guys, start making jokes, being loud, and just having a good time. In situations where you guys are up on the stage or something, do stuff that makes them look at you in a positive way. Just have fun and try to ignore them alittle. I bet atleast one of them will say something to you. Even if its "good job" or something like that. Convos and friendships and relationships all have something in common, they all have to start with ONE word - then they go very far afterwords; but without that one word, there is no friendship, relationship, or convo.

Best wishes,
Chris

[Acheron]

Originally Posted by Teddy Bear

Hey Acheron, I kinda agree with your post, but I think what we're trying to figure out is how to get the girl to want his approval in the first place. Playing hard to get with a girl that doesn't want you to begin with won't work very well.

Not necessarily. Attractive girls expect people to seek their approval, because it happens so often. By not immediately giving it to them, he makes himself more interesting even if he hasn't done much. And by playing the piano etc at youth group, he's already made himself somewhat interesting.

[Warachia]

Well I didn't say I played the piano in front of girls at youth group..

I just danced for a little bit.(Until it got interrupted)

I was thinking of just hiding in the fort(of course I'll build it up again..) and then coming out of there, singing "Blue Moon" by Frank Sinatra and grabbing a girl by the hand and dancing with her.

Sorta surprising her.

And the "give bottle of water" idea will only happen once.

After making a decent impression, I'll just go back to being "silent, still a bit mysterious" guy.

And all the planning? The girls at youth group don't about all of my planning.

The surprise will make me not only more interesting, but slightly sauve/romantic.

And since I do that only once, the girls will come to me.

[YouHearMe?]

First, I have to agree with Acheron; it's best to stay away from buying the girl(s) something as an opening to getting their attention. First, as he said, it's gonna look like buying affection. Second, if it turns out, like you said it might, that one girl rejects; any other girl who noticed will feel like second place should you offer one of them the bottle of water.

If your goal is attracting any random one of the girls, it seems like your best bet would be to carry on being outgoing and enjoyable.

If you have a specific one in your sights, I would go with making an emotional connection with her specifically, again- after getting her to take notice of you (simply so she has an idea who you are when you initiate contact).

Now; looking at your battle strategy....
Blue Moon by Frank Sinatra isn't exactly a recent number, and if this youth group is with other kids around 16, there's a really strong chance most of them won't have any idea who/what you're singing. Same with trying to take a girl by surprise into a dance number: chances are the only dances she knows are the slow-song-circle and the general motions for hip-hop from school dances.

I haven't got much for ideas you could replace them with; just that make sure you stay in your comfort zone for being outgoing; just try to make your plan a little more accessible to these girls you're trying to attract.

Hope this all made sense,

Tyler

[Warachia]

"Blue Moon" by Frank Sinatra happened to have appeared in Fallout:New Vegas.

Seems like my only battle strategy is...

-Sit at empty table
--Laugh/Smile at video
---Smile when talking to fellow guys
-Attract girls into conversation?

[YouHearMe?]

I guess that's my fault for not having much time for gaming; so I guess if the girls at your youth group are big into Fallout; have at it.

Yes, what you listed seems like a good strategy; except that it doesn't seem to be "noticeable" like you had originally wanted.

Not sure what video you're talking about?

Just make sure you act like you; I should have said that from the beginning; because if the girls don't come after you for who you really are, then you really don't want them to begin with.

Good luck

[JuliannaBean]

I tend to agree with the folks above, don't compliment a girl on her shoes. If you're going to compliment a girl on anything make sure that you mean it or are genuinely interested in her, I'm sorry but if you're trying to just impress any girl all the time at youth group then people will pick up on your desperateness. Also this is just my opinion but youth group should not be used as a dating service.

Sorry if this is to negative
Jules

[Warachia]

Well last night was different..

No girls tried to talk to me, but neither did I try to talk to them.

Went slightly mental again, hid in the back and laid on the floor(with my coat covering my head),then transferred to my usual empty table and laid down(coat over my head),transferred to the closest table to the group and said stuff to myself(quietly, of course.).

Then just went back into the area where I built my fort before.

Tried introducing myself to a girl, and stupidly asked for her phone number, no success.
Only did that, because she was probably leaving and never got a chance to talk to her(because a couple of other girls were "welcoming the newcomer")

But good news is, I can go through with "on stage" plan, because I'm going to be singing Frank Sinatra up on stage, with a spotlight and everything.

I'm thinking at the end I'll say "Well if you need me or want to talk to me, I'll either be sitting at one of those tables or in the back where the projector is l, I'll be there tonight and every Wednesday night."

Was thinking of saying some of my quotes, but those would suddenly make the girls think I'm creepy.

[Zero.]

personally, if some dude marched up to me and complimented my eyes, I'd go spaz. Start the topic casually like 'wut u gonna do after' or 'dont u get cold' if it's cold cos its cold in my place now

[Warachia]

Those compliments might not work.

One is a bit too sensual and the other is bit suckish.

On another note, my plan of singing Sinatra can work, because I've got a reservation to do it at the Christmas party.

Gonna wear my Indiana Jones Fedora to youth group tomorrow night.

I'm going to go up to the ladies and take off my hat and bow and say "Hello,ladies" and point to one of them and say"My, my, you look exceptionally ravishing tonight" and just walk away and go back to my usual empty table. Probably won't entice to come talk to me, but what the hell.

After the Sinatra performance on the 21st, I'm going "Even anyone of you ever need to talk to someone, the pastor isn't the only one. You can talk to me too and I'll listen".

Was thinking of letting them ask questions about me, but screw that.

Rather be reserved, but mysterious.

On another note, I think a girl is interested in me, because she waved at me and I guess tried to invite me into conversation with her, when I was at the bowling alley on Sunday.

I'm not sure of what to do, though..