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Relationships and Dating Ask here for advice on dates, break-ups and other relationship concerns.

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i'm terrified of the two girls that are dating my friends. - January 30th 2011, 04:49 AM

Tony is dating Vikki. Ethan is dating Ricki. I just wanted to get that set out before I start this. And Also, if I ever say Zack, I mean tony. He goes by two names.

So at first, I got a text saying "hi.." from a number and the signature was "ricki&eth3ever<3" so I immedatly knew who it was. I texted her back and she said "we need to talk.." and I was pretty scared at that point, but I tried to calm myself down so I said to her "Well.. guessing by how you said that... It's not about dandilions and marshmellows, is it.."
And then, as soon as I sent that, I got another text from Vikki. I knew it was her, because her signature was "I <33 Tony!" And she too had said "we need to talk" so I asked her what about? and she replied "um you around mine and rickis man... btw dont have an attitude with Ricki!" So i told her i never meant to have an attitude but for her to continue and she said "K look not trying to be bitch but me and Rikki are the jelus types. we love them so much and according to our friends you like to hang all over them in a more then friendly way. We dont appreciate it and are kind of upset about it." And I replied, "I never thought I was being more then friendly, so your sources may be somewhat off. But I respect the fact that your so honest about it, so I'll tone down whatever i was doing that made you uncomfortable." And she said, "Okay. we know out friends won't lie to us about this. We don't know how you are or anything. But touching ethans stomache and putting your leg on tony thats going to far. we have also been told that you were planning on dating htem before you found out about us." ANd I said, "About the dating them thing: I was kidding around, i didn;t expect everyone to take me so seriously. I'll keep that in mind, sorry. About the touchy thing with both of them.. I didn;t mean for that to hurt of offend you, its just the kind of person I am. I wont do it again" And she said, "Thank you for understanding and not cussing us out. We are just being clear with you.. people really love rumors here. But zack is my everything so please dont get between us again."

And the same conversation went on with Ricki. [or basically the same.] I also asked them not to both text me at the same time.. because it really scared me. I'm still really scared though, because they both still seem pretty tense even though things have calmed down pretty much. I'm worried they're going to get as protective as forbidding tony and ethan from being near me. They are also both the types to fight over boys.. Like first fight.

I really care about those two boys, and I think there is a difference between having a caring girlfriend and an overpowering one. And they both have really controlling girlfriends. it may not seem like it from the texts.. but they are both extremely controlling. I'm scared for myself.. and for them. i feel like crying right now.

Sorry if this is the wrong section.. it seemed appropriate to me.



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Re: i'm terrified of the two girls that are dating my friends. - January 30th 2011, 01:29 PM

Well, it sounds like you handled the situation very calmly, and I like your replies to the girls! I understand you're probably feeling scared right now, but don't let a girlfriend put your friendship with these boys in jeopardy!

If they do talk to you again, or even if they don't, I think you should talk to Tony and Ethan and let them know how you're feeling. Hopefully they'll be able to calm the girls down, and you can continue being friends.

Best wishes!


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  (#3 (permalink)) Old
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Re: i'm terrified of the two girls that are dating my friends. - January 30th 2011, 06:25 PM

Thanks.. They tried texting me today and being friendly, but I really don't want to get close with these kinds of girls.

I texted Tony yesterday and asked him if he gave Ricki my number and he said "I don't want to talk to anyone right now.. Talk to u 2morow." So I said "K goodnight."

When I was talking to the girls, i really just was trying to sound like an apologetic robot because they are the kinds you do not want to make mad.



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Re: i'm terrified of the two girls that are dating my friends. - January 30th 2011, 07:37 PM

Hi there,

I like the way you replied, it was very mature. I think those girls were just trying to scare you/alternatively start getting close to you because they're worried their guys will leave them for you. Talk about insecure. If they're your friends and you aren't acting any differently around them then chances are it's the girls and not the guys who are feeling uncomfortable, but they're probably leaning on their boyfriends to stick up for them. Just continue to be civil towards the girls and let them know that you guys are all just friends. If they can't handle that then that's their problem.



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Re: i'm terrified of the two girls that are dating my friends. - February 1st 2011, 08:58 PM

the same sort of thing has been happening to me at school
one of my friends girlfriend hates me she bitches about me behind my back dirty looks me gets all moody when im around and always freaks out when josh (her boyfriend) is near me!
i got fed up of it and ended up confronting her i said "look i dont really know you but you clearly dont like me hanging around josh and im sorry but thats not going to stop i understand that your his girlfriend but you cant separate him from his friends and he has tons of other friends that are girls but you seem to single me out as someone he should stay away from and i just want to know why" she never replyed she just stayed away from me but she is still trying to separate me and josh

at the end of the day some girls are just possessive over their boyfriends and you really did handle the situation in a very mature way if those girls want to be childish then let them but stand your ground dont let them ruin your friendship just because there insecure! and you never know they could see you as competition if your close with them.
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