The feeling of being "clingy"

[Arturiano]

The feeling of being "clingy" or obsessive in a relationship can arise for various reasons, and it’s important to understand that it’s not always tied to actual behavior. Sometimes, these feelings can stem from internal emotions or insecurities. Here are a few possible reasons why you might feel clingy in a relationship:

Lack of self-confidence: When a person doubts their own worth or fears losing their partner, they might exhibit excessive care or attention, which can come across as clinginess. The desire to be “good enough” for the partner can sometimes turn into overdoing it.

Fear of rejection: If you have a fear of being rejected, you might feel like you need to do everything to "hold onto" your partner. This can manifest as constant messaging, calls, or excessive closeness, which can feel suffocating.

Low self-esteem: People with low self-esteem may feel they don’t deserve their partner's love or attention, so they may seek constant reassurance, which can be perceived as clingy behavior.

Lack of personal boundaries: In relationships, it’s important to respect both your own and your partner’s space. If a person doesn't understand or respect their own needs and boundaries, they may unintentionally cross their partner’s, leading to feelings of clinginess.

Past relationship experiences: If you’ve experienced relationships where your partner was emotionally distant or untrustworthy, it can create anxiety and a desire to control the current relationship, which might feel clingy to your partner.

Frequent doubts and anxiety: If you tend to overthink or have anxiety, you might question your actions frequently. This can create the feeling that you're asking for too much attention from your partner or trying to "test" their feelings.

Obsessive thoughts: Sometimes, obsessive thoughts about your partner, the relationship, or the future can create a sense of pressure on the other person, even if they don’t feel it.

What can you do about it?
Work on self-esteem: Try to build confidence in yourself and learn to appreciate both your strengths and weaknesses. Recognizing your own value helps ease anxiety in relationships.

Establish clear boundaries: Have open conversations with your partner about personal boundaries and needs. This helps create a mutual understanding of healthy interaction.

Self-regulation and rest: Learn to step back and give yourself time to recharge. Sometimes it’s important to take a break from the relationship to regain balance and avoid adding tension.

Honest conversations with your partner: Openly discuss your feelings and concerns with your partner. This helps you understand how your partner perceives your behavior and fosters harmony in the relationship.

Consult a therapist: If the clinginess becomes overwhelming and starts to harm your relationship, seeking help from a professional can help you address underlying fears and anxieties. Therapy can guide you in understanding and managing these feelings.

The most important thing is not to blame yourself for how you feel but to recognize those feelings so you can improve both your relationship with yourself and your partner.

[Mindfulness.]

This is really good information to have.