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Relationships and Dating Ask here for advice on dates, break-ups and other relationship concerns.

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In love with best friend - December 7th 2020, 07:55 AM

In love with a close friend

I (F19) have known my best friend (F19) for about a year and half now, and lately we’ve gotten closer. When our other two friends (both M19) got dates, she (jokingly, I think) said that the two of us should date each other since the boys got dates. Since then we were unable to see each other cuz neither of us have a car and her aunt went away with the only car and won’t be back till January. The boys dates went well until they were mysteriously ghosted.

But during that time, I started to like her. We talk every day, and occasionally I’ll send a date idea. She likes them, but I don’t know if it’s just platonic (I remember her saying she’d like platonic dates). I try to flirt and send cutesy memes. Some days she does it back. Some days it seems like she likes me but other days it seems like the opposite and I don’t know what to think. I want to ask, but I feel like that’ll ruin everything unless it’s reciprocated. At the same time, I’m afraid if it is reciprocated, the relationship will fall and then ruin everything. I don’t know if I should say something or just wait for it to die out?? What should I do?



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Re: In love with best friend - December 12th 2020, 02:51 PM

Do you think you like her romantically or platonically?

Best friendships can involve love and even feel quite close and intense at times. Nothing wrong with going on platonic dates either. Of course, it makes things more complicated if you feel you have developed romantic feelings for your best friend. It's entirely up to you how to approach this. You could try and talk about your feelings but there is a risk that it could make things a bit awkward between you two unless you can find a way to laugh it off and move on so that your feelings don't interfere with the friendship. You don't have to talk about your feelings if you feel that it might not be reciprocated. In that case, you can just carry on as normal and perhaps look for a relationship elsewhere to help preserve your friendship.


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Re: In love with best friend - December 12th 2020, 09:50 PM

I think your present friendship is more than mutual, in fact I'd say you more than like her and she is quite reciprocating. It's just a feeling I sense after reading your message through again. I think its sweet how you both have built up your friendship, but done it gradually.

Perhaps the two of you could go out on a date? If she likes the idea, together choose a nice restaurant and make an advanced booking to a popular restaurant in town and enjoy a candlelit dinner.

Nothing is more heartwarming than an intimate dinner by candlelight. And the exciting part is where it might lead if she is wanting something more serious.

To hesitate will bring nothing. But a leap in the dark? There is excitement there, and a little bit of bravery.
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