TeenHelp - I found out that my best friend that i have a crush on had sex with her boyfriend

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I found out that my best friend that i have a crush on had sex with her boyfriend

Last night my friend started saying somthing about somthing shes done and it would hurt me if i found out so i got curious and asked what it was and she said that shes had sex with her boyfriend and it hurt me alot because were 16. I have been feeling a lot of diffrent emotions and it sucks a lot. I really
Like her and idk what to do

Re: I found out that my best friend that i have a crush on had sex with her boyfriend

First of all, welcome to TeenHelp.

I'm sorry that hearing about your friend's experience was so difficult for you. It's difficult to hear about someone we like being affectionate with others. Unfortunately it sounds like she's really invested in the relationship she's in right now. As hard as it is, I don't think there's much you can do about that. Are there other relationships you can focus on to distract yourself from the tension in this? Perhaps there are some hobbies you enjoy that you could get more involved in. It also might be a good idea to tell your friend that you aren't up for that level of sharing. Hopefully she'll understand and not press the issue.

Take care. Please feel free to PM me if you ever need anything; my inbox is always open.

Re: I found out that my best friend that i have a crush on had sex with her boyfriend

Her relationship with her boyfriend is horrible. He treats her and me and friends badly. I cant get my mind off it and it is tearing me up

Re: I found out that my best friend that i have a crush on had sex with her boyfriend

Hey,
The situation you're in really sucks. I know it hurts a lot when a crush doesn't like you back in the same way, and then even more when they love someone else. Like Jordan says, the fact that she's had sex with him shows that she's probably very invested in the relationship. Although best friends share a lot, you are perfectly within your right to ask her not to discuss things like sex with you. It can hurt, especially with your feelings for her.
It is difficult to move on from liking someone, but that would probably be the best thing for you to do right now. If you don't, there's the risk that this could drive a wedge between you as friends, and as cliched as it sounds, friendships are incredibly important. You don't need to move on by finding someone else to crush on, but try to acknowledge to yourself that these feelings won't go anyway, and focus on different things. Take time for yourself as well. Look after yourself, treat yourself, and perhaps try and spend some time with other friends or with a group of friends, to make the situation feel less intense.
Take care :hug: