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Staying friends with ex boyfriend that moved?
I met this guy through some of my friends. We started talking a little bit and after a couple months, we both fell in love with each other. It may sound crazy because it was in a short time but I've never felt this way towards anyone before.
He recently left to go to college and now he lives on the other side of the country. At first I wanted to stay together and make it work but he said that it wouldn't work out because after college he is definitely staying there because he absolutely loves the state. I know that this situation is really hard for both of us. We decided to stay friends and keep in touch- some days I wonder if this is the right choice to make. I don't know if I should stay friends with him because it is making it so much harder for me to move on and not think about losing him, but he is one of the only people that is here for me right now. Is it worth it in the future to continue talking to him or will it drag me behind? Also, any other advice on how to make this work or make it easier for me will be appreciated |
Re: Staying friends with ex boyfriend that moved?
Hey there :) It sounds like a tough situation you're in. If I were you I would distance myself from him for a while, until I felt less strongly about him. This just means talking to him less, but shooting him a text every once in a while to ask how he's doing.
I hope this works out :) |
Re: Staying friends with ex boyfriend that moved?
Personally I don't see anything wrong in remaining friends with him but I also feel that if it's going to cause to emotional difficulties it may be best to put some communication distance between the both of you for the time being. This way it'll allow you to focus on processing what's happened and working towards moving on a little better than you currently are.
After I split with someone we didn't talk for several months with the exception of wishing each other happy birthday, Merry Christmas etc and the distance apart and the lack of communication really helped. Now we've chosen to remain friends and sure we don't talk all the time but when we do, we can talk about all kinds of things because the situation and our feelings have long since changed. |
Re: Staying friends with ex boyfriend that moved?
Thank you, that helped a little bit. Distancing myself will hopefully help this situation and maybe our friendship will be stronger later on
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Re: Staying friends with ex boyfriend that moved?
Hey there,
I think if I was in your current situation I would probably cease contact. It's hard enough having a relationship end but being in contact with them just makes things more difficult. Maybe in time it will be easier for the two of you to talk and be friends but right now with the way you're feeling I don't think it is good for you. Speaking to him is only going to make things more difficult and make it harder for you to move on. For the time being I would distance myself and give yourself some time to think on your situation and decide what really is important and whether you are going to be able to put your feelings aside and try to keep up a friendship or it is better if you don't communicate with him. Your wellbeing should come first and if not speaking to him is in your best interests then it could be a good idea to put a stop to all contact. Best of luck, Paige |
Re: Staying friends with ex boyfriend that moved?
The decision is yours. If you're unable to emotionally handle a friendship, there's nothing wrong with that. Personally, I would want to stay friends with my current partner no matter what happens, and that's something I've made him promise me. He is too important in my life to ever lose, even if he were to fall out of love with me or something. But that's not how everybody feels. I've definitely had to let go of people in my life due to the way the relationship progressed. You need to do what is best for you!
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