Non-PG13: Dad's girlfriend is pregnant

[Theboss112233]

I just found out that my dads girlfriend is pregnant. She is 17 weeks in. The bad part is that I barely even know her, I don't even know how to spell her name correctly. How should I feel?

[Kate*]

There is no right or wrong way to feel about anything. However you feel is perfectly fine.

Hey there.

This must be a rather confusing situation for you to be in. You might be confused about what's next and how you feel exactly. The thing is, like Katie said; there is no right or wrong way to feel about this. Just let yourself process the emotions revolving around this situation as they come. Don't be afraid to talk to your dad about any feelings, thoughts or questions you have about this.

As for his girlfriend, do you want to get to know her better and become closer since her child will be your half-sibling? Figure out what you want to do throughout this at either a slow or fast pace. However you feel like doing so. Having a half-sibling could be an exciting experience for you as well, right? You're welcome to talk about any of this if you'd like. To your dad, to her and to us if you'd like.

Take care and I hope this turns out to be a positive experience for you.

[xxpaigiexx]

Hey there,

I understand this must be a confusing time for you. You've found out your dad's girlfriend is pregnant and you barely know her. Maybe now could be a good time to get to know her a little better. This woman is having your baby brother or sister and you are going to have to know each other better at some stage. Maybe you could ask your dad if his girlfriend would like to go out for lunch or dinner with you, or spend a day shopping. It could give the two of you a little time to get to know each other better before the baby arrives.

It must be weird to think that you have a little brother or sister coming soon, especially so unexpectedly. But this is a positive thing. It's nice having younger siblings, and it's nice to be able to teach them things that no one else is able to. Maybe you could have a look at some gift ideas for the baby, it could be good to show that you are pleased about this news and looking forward to having a younger brother or sister.

I know it may be strange now but you will adjust and you will get used to having a baby around.

I wish you the best of luck, I'm always here if you need a chat.

Paige

[Theboss112233]

But I already have a brother, and my mom died, not divorced so it makes it even worse

Your mom passed away? I'm so sorry to hear that. I can't imagine how that all by itself must feel, then to have this situation pop up. No wonder you feel so confused right now. You shouldn't feel an obligation or be expected to suddenly become extremely close to your dad's girlfriend in any sort of way that would make you feel as your mom is being replaced. No one can take your mom's place.

That's great that you already have a sibling. Even though you already have a sibling, this will be a different, unique individual with a different personality and therefore, a new bond; not to replace your brother or anything but just a new experience. You know what I mean? So that could still be a positive thing. But it's okay if you have feelings other than positive ones right now.

Honestly, it might be best to just work through the feelings as they come rather than forcing yourself to try and work out your feelings all at once when you aren't even sure how you feel exactly. If you do start having negative feelings or concerns about anything, as I said, don't be afraid to communicate them to your dad. Being open about how you feel can help a lot sometimes.

Do you have anyone to talk to about your feelings regarding your mom, or at least any emotional outlets for your thoughts and feelings? Journaling and creative writing might be helpful. I'm sorry again to hear about your mom. That must make this a lot harder for you and complicate the situation a bit.