Relationships and Dating Ask here for advice on dates, break-ups and other relationship concerns.
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Member
Welcome me, I'm new! *
Age: 25
Posts: 5
Join Date: April 8th 2015
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Friends and boyfriend all hate me -
April 8th 2015, 12:51 AM
My friends hate me, I guess you could say I'm in the popular group. I recently befriended a group of new friends in that group which helped me through my recent break up. I use reckless behaviour to get over my relationships so I guess about a month after My bf broke up with me I just went directly to having sex with some guy. I did like him. It hurt my ex boyfriend very much. These new friends helped me out a lot with my break up. They weren't the best of friends they were really rude and full of them selves most of the time but they were still friends to me.. A bit later my ex sweet talked me into going for him again and what not but only for me to find out he played me. So once again we broke up but then I did it again I hooked up with another boy. But this was my new friends Crush and she liked him a lot and he sorta liked her. I don't know why I did it. I hated myself so much for it but we kept it a secret. In the meantime my boyfriend and I got back together. I keep going back because I love him. But he clearly stated if I had sex with another person he would kill himself. I did not want that so I kept it a secret for even longer. Recently my boyfriend broke up with me again. Me and those group of girls havent talked in 3 weeks, which was not my doing. Then the secret came out and they all started to hate me and I don't even know what my ex boyfriend thinks. Everyone hates me and I hate myself even more for being such a horrible person. I just want to know what you guys think about this. It's killing me and I feel so horrible. Btw sorry if it was unclear but I never cheated on my boyfriend. I did this stuff while we were broken up. I have real friends from before these girls that support me but I know that a lot of people hate me now because of this. I'm so sad I can hardly function. I can't go to school im so scared of everyone.
-marie
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I have the Millennium Puzzle
I've been here a while ********
Name: Calaer
Age: 30
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,678
Points: 20,292, Level: 20 |
Join Date: March 20th 2013
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Re: Friends and boyfriend all hate me -
April 8th 2015, 03:39 PM
Hey there! First off, you aren't a horrible person. We all make mistakes, and this was your way of coping though a tough situation. Did you know that the guy you hooked up with was the girls crush, or did you only find out after? If you knew, ask yourself, did you do it to hurt her feelings for not being the 'best' friend she could have been? Sometimes we subconsciously do things without truly understanding why. If these new friends weren't totally there for you like they should have been, maybe that's why.
As for your ex, things like this are tough. If you feel like you want to be with him, and you feel like he's going to treat you the way you deserve then just explain to him that you did this in the past, and that he shouldn't allow this to get in the way of you two. Explain to him that you truly like him, and that you would truly like one more chance to prove yourself.
As of everyone hating you, this is high school. One week everyone will hate you, the next they love you. I say just give it time. You can say your sorry to everyone and make peace, then just give them space to get over whatever it is they are going on about.
May I also suggest finding other ways to cope, rather than having sex with other people. Not only can that be dangerous if you don't use protection, or know others sexual history, but it's not the biggest confidence building coping tactic. Maybe you could try painting, cooking, or even dancing.
I'm always here if you want to talk. Feel free to PM/VM me anytime! I hope things get better for you soon. Take care!
"One day, in retrospect, the years of struggle will strike you as the most beautiful." ~Sigmund Freud
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Member
Welcome me, I'm new! *
Age: 25
Posts: 5
Join Date: April 8th 2015
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Re: Friends and boyfriend all hate me -
April 8th 2015, 05:46 PM
I agree with yo 100% Thankyou so much! I did decide this time it would be different and I will take up other coping strategies! You helped a lot your the best <3
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I have the Millennium Puzzle
I've been here a while ********
Name: Calaer
Age: 30
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,678
Points: 20,292, Level: 20 |
Join Date: March 20th 2013
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Re: Friends and boyfriend all hate me -
April 9th 2015, 01:24 PM
Thank you. I hope all goes well, and I wish you the best of luck! Take care~
"One day, in retrospect, the years of struggle will strike you as the most beautiful." ~Sigmund Freud
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