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Relationships and Dating Ask here for advice on dates, break-ups and other relationship concerns.

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Online dating - March 4th 2014, 12:56 AM

So, I feel awkward for posting this but I don't really know I feel like I need to get it out. I've been posting way too much on this forum lately.

I was talking to my dad and he knows that one of the things that bothers me is the fact that I've never had a relationship. So he was talking to me and he suggested that I try online dating. This is a really awkward suggestion because I feel like I'll just be destined to meet some weird men but I am not good at meeting people in real life so this could be a potential way to meet people.

I was talking to my friend and he agreed that it could be a good way for me to meet people. He knows I am on guard with people and he was saying in order to get past that barrier online 'dating' might be the way to go.

But, I am scared. I don't do well at putting myself out there and putting pictures on the internet for people to judge would be really hard. And, opening myself up to rejection and all the things that come along with dating scare me. However, I would, I guess, like to meet someone and this might be the way to do it. Even if it doesn't work it might be a way to start the process until I get better at opening myself for more.

I mean, I don't really know. I don't know what is best at this point in time. I know I am struggling with depression and thinking about entering into dating worries me and I wonder if it is right. But, this is something I can grab onto and change in my life and this is a change I have been looking for so why not go for it? I've been thinking about giving it three months or something like that and if it doesn't work I could stop paying for the site I am considering. My friend was telling me there are free sites that are reputable but I don't know of any so I am going to go with one that you pay for. I just don't know if this is the right step to take. People absolutely scare me. Men scare me and I mean, I don't have a whole lot to offer in a relationship. I don't know.

Any thoughts or suggestions would be greatly appreciated.
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Re: Online dating - March 4th 2014, 12:37 PM

Hey!

If you don't feel comfortable doing the online dating, there are other ways to meet people in the "dating environment" Ever heard of Speed Dating? It's where you go sign up, show up and they basically have you sit at a table where the males have like 5 minutes to get to know you and you get to know them. Once that bell rings the next guy sits at your table.

It's like you get the full package in one go! You get to visually see the guy, you get to have a verbal conversation, you get to see if you like the person, you can exchange numbers/emails right then, also you can get the 'feel' for that person. So you can totally rule out any creepy guys then and keep the ones that you feel you would like to get to know better. There are hosts that host the Speed Dating so they watch the tables and make sure everyone is abiding by all rules.

I've never personally tried Speed Dating but I hear all about it. I read up on it when I wanted to sign up then there was this "minimum" age requirement... I've used many online dating sites in the past and sometimes you get creepy guys messaging you asking for favors, some seem totally down to earth then they get really demanding, then there are some who are just not interested or those who are interested and it goes well.


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Re: Online dating - March 5th 2014, 02:41 AM

I don't know what I want to do really. I've talked to two friends about this and they both say I should give it a try. I told my one friend maybe we could get together and set up my profile next week. But, I am still uncertain if I am ready. I don't know if I'll ever be ready to date. I don't really know what the right step to take is. I just have so much anxiety over the whole thing. Men terrify me and the idea of potentially 'dating' people freaks me out a little. Maybe I am not ready but it could just be that this is a feeling I'll have to deal with no matter what I do.
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