Moving in with Boyfriend

[Eternal]

Sup guys.
So, my boyfriend and I are thinking about getting an apartment together next year. Our parents are fine with it and can help us pay for the rent if we run into any problems (although we both have two jobs so money isn't too much of a problem right now).

The only thing is, we're both a little nervous about it. We've been together for about 8 months now and we're pretty much inseparable- we're basically living together right now and we sleep together in either his or my dorm room every night. We like to think that if we can manage this then we can manage living together officially, but it's still scary not knowing if things will work out and if they don't next year we will be stuck.

Does anyone have any tips? Or any stories about moving in with your significant other and what it was like? By next September when we will hopefully move in together, we will have been together for 1 year and 4 months which I think is a reasonable amount of time to be together before moving in together, especially given the amount of time we spend together.

[taylalatbh.]

I don't have any tips or tricks but I say just go for it. If you two feel that comfortable with each other and you manage to stay this strong up until September then great. There's no way of knowing whether it'll work out or not until you try it but it sounds like you get on well enough.

I hope things work out!

[PSY]

I moved into an apartment with my boyfriend after dating for 20 months; however, we were already planning on getting married long before we moved in together (he proposed 4 months later), so it's different from what you're considering. The best advice I can offer is to be completely honest with yourself, and to encourage your boyfriend to do the same. If you have any issues now, then there's a good chance they'll become even bigger issues after you begin to live together. Communicate! I thought my communication was great... until I started living with my boyfriend. Be prepared for an adjustment period, even if you two love each other. Get a sense for how the two of you will deal with each other's "pet peeves" and "quirks" (e.g., if one partner dumps clothing on the floor and the other partner is a "neat freak," how will you two address that conflict?). If you have any - and I mean ANY - doubts, then hold off on moving in together. Better safe than sorry, because as you said, changing/breaking a lease agreement is a pain in the butt.

[DemonQueen]

I moved in with my boyfriend after only five months of dating but I suppose my situation was a little different because I was also pregnant. Anyway... I agree with Robin. Get ready for an adjustment period. I thought living with Matt was going to be great because I stayed with him almost every night but it was a lot different to live with him. After a while I noticed every little thing that he did, the things I liked and didn't like. Aside from the pet peeves and quirks you also need to remember that living on your own also means paying bills. I know you said money isn't too much of a problem but problem or not it's still pretty stressful. Sometimes I have to help him with his half and vice versa. Moving in with someone is a pretty big deal and is a lot to take in. Just make sure you are absolutely positive about it and I'm sure all will work out!!

[Eternal]

Originally Posted by Amber

Aside from the pet peeves and quirks you also need to remember that living on your own also means paying bills. I know you said money isn't too much of a problem but problem or not it's still pretty stressful. !

Yeah this is definitely something I've taken into consideration. I'm already paying for a third of my school tuition and for groceries and such on my own. It's actually cheaper if we split the rent for an apartment rather than stayed in the dorms next year which is why we are hoping to be able to move in together next year (and we're going to start looking when it gets closer to the Spring).

[SamMarie]

I don't have experience with this honestly, but I thought I'd bring my thoughts on the table. "Practically" living together and then living together seem pretty different to me. You really depend on each other financially and the sorts. I think balancing the relationship while also worrying about the apartment would be the most difficult unless you two are pretty much on top of things naturally. I think we can all agree that there are pro's and con's to everything. It's the results and working through it that matters. No one can really depict the future, so, learn the ropes because each thing is indeed an experience. I hope someday I get to live with my boyfriend too. We've talked about it, but nothing is official as of right now. Good luck!