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Relationships and Dating Ask here for advice on dates, break-ups and other relationship concerns.

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Dating (sorta) conundrum - December 5th 2013, 02:28 AM

Okay, so I'm in a bit of a conundrum.


I'm here in college and I haven't exactly been ‘tearing things up’ on the dating side of things. There is one girl, (let's just call her #1) I met at the college summer camp whom I really like, but I haven't been able to go on a 'date' or anything like that because of schedule conflicts and lack of time. Now, I have no idea where I stand with #1 at this time. A mutual friend of ours said she has talked about me and has said that she “likes me” and that I’m “different” (as in I’m not the typical douche who just wants in her pants). This was good news to me three months ago, but me, being a bumbling idiot completely dropped the ball and failed to act. I see her every once in a while at her work and we usually have a short conversation or even a long one depending on how busy it is and pretty much reminds me how much I like her.


Now, one of my other friends (she doesn't know girl #1) is 'setting me up' with one of her friends (let's call her girl #2) for a date on Friday. I know very little about girl #2 aside from her first name and what she looks like. She's cute but not nearly so as girl #1 (girl #1 is pretty much a perfect 10 as far as I’m concerned and has a nice personality).

So my question is should I go on this one or so dates with girl #2, let her down easy and continue my endeavor to date #1 or should I just shift over to girl #2 and make the best of it I can??

Thanks in advance.
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Re: Dating (sorta) conundrum - December 7th 2013, 07:16 AM

Hi there, John.

I'm sorry that no one responded to this thread sooner.

Well, Friday is now over, so I'm left wondering what you decided to do! I feel as if you should continue to see both of them. Meaning, go out on a date (or several dates) and see where things go with #2! In regards to girl #1, continue to have brief conversations with her, and let everything else be. If things with girl #2 fail to work out, you can try with girl #1.

You're in no way obligated to either of these girls. And even if you're taking a girl out on a date to see where things can go, that only restricts you to a certain extent. Meaning you're not in a relationship with that person, but instead you're trying to figure out if you would like to enter a relationship with her. While entertained in that process of figuring that out, you can most certainly "talk" to other girls and keep the communication open.

As I said, explore both fields, see where one goes and then go from there. If you make a decision and pick just one girl to explore if you would like to be with her or not and shut down the other girl, then you will most likely end up regretting your decision in the end. So keep open your door to a possible relationship that any girl can walk through at any time (i.e., don't put restrictions or limitations on yourself while exploring your options).


Best wishes,
Chris


"You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream.”
— Malala Yousafzai
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Update - December 7th 2013, 11:48 PM

Well, it didn't go down on Friday, it instead went down today. The weather sucked (actually it's pretty entertaining mixing a bunch of Texans, 18 degree weather and a half an inch of ice together) but I had a good time with girl number 2. She's a very pretty girl in person, very nice too.
Talked to girl 1 briefly a few days ago, nothin' new to report.

Other opinions are still welcome.

Thanks.
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