Having Second thoughts about Boyfriend

[MEJordan]

Alrighty so, I’ve been with my current boyfriend for roughly 3 months now. I was happy with him when we were physically together, but whenever we would be apart, the lack of feelings I had for him was somewhat of a concern. Anyways, about a week after we got together, I re-established a relationship with a boy I had been friends with 12 years ago, and we began talking daily and hung out once, in a coffee shop. A friend of mine told me several weeks later that he liked me, but I did not believe her. Turns out, he did like me, and I like him. I’ve just recently told him I liked him, but he’s also got a girlfriend he just got together with. I don’t want to come between them, and don’t intend to interfere with their relationship, but it got me thinking that I’m not too happy with my current boyfriend. He drinks, smokes and parties, rarely texts me, drops conversations and we only see one another maybe twice a week. When he’s sweet, he is absolutely wonderful, but it’s becoming rare and I just don’t know if it’s enough. Again, I have no intention of getting with my other friend (though he did say he still likes me) because i respect his relationship. What do you think I should do?

[Deleted115]

Hello!


This type of situation is a minefield of confusion; but the answer is usually clear!

So to begin with; your boyfriend doesn't sound like relationship material; sounds more like a person who'd prefer to meet girls on a one night stand. But thats my opinion.

Anyway, You could tell Your current boyfriend how you feel; and go your seperate ways. Overall the relationship you are IN with your current boyfriend seems to be quite shaky, so you can Do ONE of TWO things with your Current Boyfriend

1.Talk it all out with him, tell him how you feel, and try to change things with your current boyfriend, see if it Can work, try to turn it all Around with him.

2.Just plain leave him. ( as harsh as it may seem, i do advise this for you. )

Now your single!

(ALTERNATIVE!!)

IF you Would Consider dating your other friend, Read ---



Now the simple answer to this is; he has to choose between You or His other girlfriend, ( to determine who he likes more)

Now you do respect their relationship, Which is good, However, if he would prefer you, and not her, it'd be more of a Good thing for Him to be with a person he'd prefer.

Bottom line is; ask him if he'd prefer YOU or HER, you won't be getting in the way of their relationship Unless he prefers You, then you'd be doing him a favour by making him be with a person He loves more.

Ofcourse this is only if you wanted to be with him.


You can leave your boyfriend, and be single,

You can leave your boyfriend, and try to get with your other friend,

You can Try to turn things around in your current relationship.

Which do you prefer to do?

[Skeleton]

If you're having second thoughts about your boyfriend and don't see your relationship getting any better than what it is then maybe it would be best to break up with him. I wouldn't advise trying anything with your friend, regardless of what you do about your current relationship, if he has a girlfriend. Although you may like each other, he is with someone and you don't want to be the one who comes between them.

If you are unsatisfied with a relationship, it's a good idea to ask yourself if you can fix it and, if so, do you want to fix it. If the answer to either of those is no, it's time to move on. If you feel like your relationship isn't good for you anymore, and you don't see or want it to really become good again, then it may be time to leave.

[Ambiance]

Egh. I've been in the exact same situation. Although, the guy I liked who had a girlfriend ended up being the type that would drink, smoke, party, and hardly talk to me once we started dating. I could tell you to try to talk to him about it, and communication is always for the best, and that would be the best advice. And, yet, there's no use in second guessing yourself if you just don't feel comfortable with the relationship entirely. Or, secure in your feelings would probably be a better way to put it. When I was with my first boyfriend, I was super unhappy. And the second guy I liked just showed me that, hey, there are going to be other people that I like that are interested, even if we can't date. and we did end up dating, it often happens this way. And now I've evolved to look for someone who's not drinking and smoking and partying. It's just a natural process everyone goes through.