Young carers (caregivers) – Caring for a loved one

[Rob]

Young carers (caregivers) – Caring for a loved one
By Jessie (Palmolive)

How to know if you’re a carer for someone with a mental or physical health problem.
If you are under the age of 18 and provide care to a family member, you are considered a young caregiver. It may be the case that your parent suffers with an illness that results in you not only caring for them, but also caring for your siblings. You don’t necessarily have to live with the person you care for.

Caring for somebody can include supporting the person emotionally; doing household jobs such as cleaning, cooking, washing, etc; helping with their medical care by doing things such as collecting prescriptions, giving injections, or even ensuring the person you are caring for has taken their medication. It can also mean helping the person with their physical care and helping them move around or taking them outside their residence. It might be that you help the person with their personal care by doing things such as washing and dressing them.

What is it like to be a young carer/caregiver?
Caring for somebody can help young people learn new skills and build upon existing ones. The experience can be positive in some aspects; however, it can be exhausting and a hard thing for young people to deal with. It can be a very stressful life situation, and although you may feel the pressure to care for a loved one, it’s important to look after yourself as well.

Being a young carer can be stressful. If you are a young carer, know that it is okay for you to take some time off for yourself. You have the right to be children, too! It's okay for you to continue meeting friends, pursuing your education, and striving to achieve your goals/dreams.

What support can a young carer receive?
There is plenty of support for young people who care for a loved one. If you’re a student, you can try talking to a guidance counselor or your pastoral support officer. These people can be great sources of support, and might even be able to put you in contact with someone who can help you more than they can. Investigate the support your school/college has to offer. Some schools have staff who work solely with young carers. The beauty of this is that they will have seen it all before. They won’t be surprised about anything you say, they won’t judge, and they will try their best to understand you and support you in a way which you will benefit from. If you have a social worker or doctor/GP, you can also talk to them about what support is available to you, as well as what support they can offer your family.

It might be that the person you are caring for has a community psychiatric nurse. If they do, it might be helpful for you to make an appointment with them to discuss their illness and how you can help them get through it. If you are under the age of sixteen, and you feel you are a young carer, you can contact social services, who should be able to carry out a young carers/caregivers assessment. This will help you gain the support you need, not just for yourself, but for your family, too.

Organisations such as Action for Young Carers (AYC) can also help provide support for you. You can search for organisations online or talk to your doctor about them. These organisations can offer emotional support for you, establish further support for you and your family, and some even offer residential trips to help give you a break from your caregiving duties. These trips can be one or several days long, and include doing fun activities and getting to meet and socialise with other young carers! Action for Young Carers is an organisation in England, but there are plenty of similar organisations around the world. If you live in Canada, there's a wonderful organisation called Young Carer Canada, which provides information, and another in Australia called CarersAustralia, which provides support and information for those who are young and caring for someone. The American Association of Caregiving Youth (AACY) supports young caregivers and promotes awareness regarding the challenges they face while attempting to care for ill, injured, elderly, and/or disabled family members.

How to cope with being a young carer.
Being a young carer can cause unpleasant feelings. It can make you worry a lot and can also cause you to feel sad/stressed. It’s important that you put things into place to help you deal with supporting a loved one. Different things help different people, so it might be worth trying different coping techniques to help you. This may include:

• Writing your feelings and thoughts down.
• Talking to someone about what is going on and how you are feeling.
• Meeting other young carers.
• Socialising with friends.
• Taking time off for yourself.
• Participating in arts and crafts.
• Engaging in sports and other physical activities.
• Eating healthily.
• Taking part in relaxation and/or mindfulness techniques.
• Listening to music.
• Writing a list of all the positive things in your life.
• Seeking professional help.

Even when you are caring for someone, it’s important to care for yourself, too.

Do you have to care for your loved one?
Understandably, you may feel a lot of pressure to care for a loved one who has a mental or physical illness; however, you have the right and freedom to say "no" to caring for them and to talk to other people who can provide the support your loved one needs. Your loved one is entitled to additional support, and if you feel you cannot provide them with the right support, or that’s it too much for you to cope with, then it’s fine for you to be honest and say so.

It's important for all young caregivers to know that caring for their loved one is not their responsibility. Sometimes, things can become hard at home, and it can start to take over a carer's life. If you get to that stage, be sure to reach out for help. You can even call your emergency service in order to receive immediate help. This can be scary to do, but these people can help you get through crisis situations. They're there to help everyone in need of help.

Remember, you’re not alone!