How can we improve TeenHelp for ours trans community?

[Rob]

I have heard that some trans members of our community do not feel that TeenHelp is as supportive as it could be. What can TeenHelp do to make our community more inviting & inclusive for our trans members? If you don't feel comfortable posting in this thread, please send me a PM. Thank you.

[BoyNextDoor]

what would *they* like to have?
i’m cis so i can’t say: oh i think this and this and that would make the forum better for trans people


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[Starseeker]

[Quoted post deleted at user's request]

I do believe this is too far. If we decide not to celebrate Harry Potter Day, then we are excluding Harry Potter fans, aren't we? Now if we ban something else, we exclude others, and so on, so on. It becomes an unending cycle. I do not support violence or hate speech on the site. However, I do see a line between the Harry Potter fandom and its author's personal voice.

[Storyteller.]

Originally Posted by Silvan

I do believe this is too far. If we decide not to celebrate Harry Potter Day, then we are excluding Harry Potter fans, aren't we? Now if we ban something else, we exclude others, and so on, so on. It becomes an unending cycle.

There's a quote that I've seen passed around on social media a lot in recent times: "You can say ‘all are welcome’ but if wolves and sheep are both welcome you’re only going to get wolves..." There's more to it than that, including the fact that refusing to choose in itself is a choice, and I think it's very relevant here. Celebrating Harry Potter is automatically excluding trans folks, and it's not a fair exchange - making an entire community of people feel unsafe over something they have no control over in order to be welcoming to people who choose to engage with and support content created by an outspoken exclusionist. There is no line between the author and the fandom when that author uses the fandom to justify trying to push her own transphobic views onto everyone else. She's made it clear that she believes people supporting her content means that they support her views, and the continued popularity of the franchise gives her voice far more weight in the discussion than it should have. So, yeah... prioritising being welcoming to everyone over being safe for vulnerable people isn't the way to make trans people feel at home here.

I do think there have been strides towards inclusivity - including the pronoun option in profiles, for example. That said, it hasn't been consistent. I've been misgendered by higher-ups, I've seen transphobic comments allowed to stand uncontested, I've seen people shut down for trying to explain why certain things are transphobic. I think that kind of thing needs to be addressed. I also think, assuming it is addressed, that it would be a good idea to add something into the site rules to specifically denounce transphobia. I know that gender identity is mentioned in the Equal Opportunities Statement, but personally I feel that alone is too vague to be very reassuring. If transphobia really isn't allowed, that fact should be built into the rules of the site and should be very clearly stated. I can't speak for all trans people, but that might go some way towards promoting inclusivity.

[Dawn.]

I think this is a great question.

[Starseeker]

Originally Posted by Wingless.

There's a quote that I've seen passed around on social media a lot in recent times: "You can say ‘all are welcome’ but if wolves and sheep are both welcome you’re only going to get wolves..." There's more to it than that, including the fact that refusing to choose in itself is a choice, and I think it's very relevant here. Celebrating Harry Potter is automatically excluding trans folks, and it's not a fair exchange - making an entire community of people feel unsafe over something they have no control over in order to be welcoming to people who choose to engage with and support content created by an outspoken exclusionist. There is no line between the author and the fandom when that author uses the fandom to justify trying to push her own transphobic views onto everyone else. She's made it clear that she believes people supporting her content means that they support her views, and the continued popularity of the franchise gives her voice far more weight in the discussion than it should have. So, yeah... prioritising being welcoming to everyone over being safe for vulnerable people isn't the way to make trans people feel at home here.

Hmm... I separate the author and their books. Harry Potter is one of fantasy worlds I grew up with - I'm admitting it. Am I going to be known as a transphobe and a wolf now?

I don't have much to say at this time, other than I personally think the current discussion of the recent "Harry Potter Day" is not entirely the real issue here. It is an example of how trans/non-binary/gender nonconforming individuals aren't considered as much on TeenHelp, currently, but I think the more important question is the original: how can the staff and members work to make TeenHelp a more trans inclusive space? Although I myself am departing soon, I'm interested in hearing what others have to say.

[Celyn]

I'm not trans so can't really speak on this subject.

I'd like to think I'm fairly understanding....at the very least I don't believe I would treat a trans person any differently than how I treat anyone else. And I do make an effort to use the right name and pronouns. But for me, personally, I think I'd like to explore more about what it means to be trans. I'm more of a deep dive kind of person so reading accounts from trans people or research featuring trans people's voices might help (well, it might help me at least).

So, full disclosure: I asked Rob to delete my posts.

I want to say that my feelings and opinions reflect exactly what Holly said immediately above my post here. I’d like to believe I am understanding in that I would never treat a Trans+ individual negatively; and I can’t claim to know the extent or truly understand what they’ve gone through historically and in the present time. I always use correct the pronouns when I learn of them and if it’s never explicitly stated, I ask as uncomfortable as that may be I don’t want to offend.

As Holly said, I’m also more about the personal, intimate stories. I want to understand and hear about the first-hand account from Trans+ folks. I want to be directed towards the correct resources so I can better understand different topics in regards to transphobia and Trans+ rights.

Here’s the thing, let’s make it personal to me. You can advocate for Deaf people all you want! But unless you were born Deaf or raise a Deaf child (whilst not forcing them to go under a brutal procedure for Cochlear Implants) immersed in their community; you would never be able to understand the struggles I’ve had to endure; what the struggle is that Deaf folks continue to endure in an aural world.

I can educate you on how Cochlear Implants can be harmful towards minors, why it’d be a better idea until that child is of age to make an informed decision by themselves, why language immersion — such as American Sign Language — is more important than forcing them to communicate in spoken English; but you’ll still not understand that feeling of ostracization and discrimination, you’ll never feel the burden I do.

I think it's of much more value to hear from Trans+ folks than from allies such as myself and Holly.

[Doodle.]

From what I'm reading, this is due to the Harry Potter Day thing. For the past few years I've been questioning whether or not I'm non-binary, I've never felt like woman or a man. I feel weird calling myself trans as I'm not transitioning and I pass as a cis woman (I'm afab) I also feel like there's SO much discrimination trans people face which I don't. With all that please take what I'm saying with a grain of salt. I am too disgusted by JK Rowling and her views. I still have an attachment to the Harry Potter universe. It's the whole seperating the art from the artist thing, I personally refuse to support her financially but will support fan-made products. I will most likely buy the new video game coming out but second-hand. We can still appreciate Harry Potter AND disavow JK Rowling's views.

[Doodle.]

One thing I will ask is if we could change the gender thing on our profiles to say "woman" "man" or "non-binary" instead of male of female. Female and male are sexes rather than genders. I found it a little confusing to edit when I came back due to this.

[Everglow.]

Much like other users, I don't have a right to comment on this with an opinion. I hope that I can take on board other peoples views on this though to make myself more open and inclusive. I think questions like these are super important and it's a really good thing to acknowledge mistakes or areas for growth.

[Storyteller.]

Originally Posted by Silvan

Hmm... I separate the author and their books. Harry Potter is one of fantasy worlds I grew up with - I'm admitting it. Am I going to be known as a transphobe and a wolf now?

I won't go into this any further since this isn't the Debates forum and, as others have pointed out, it's probably not the main issue... but I would encourage you to consider why it was that your sole contribution to a thread meant to discuss how to make transgender people feel safe on the site was to defend consuming content created by a transphobe.

Originally Posted by Celyn

I'm more of a deep dive kind of person so reading accounts from trans people or research featuring trans people's voices might help (well, it might help me at least).

This is a really good idea! Maybe we could see if some trans members wanted to write articles or other pieces about their own experiences, the challenges they've faced, etc. It could also be worth looking into expanding trans-related coverage on the Resources page, or even potentially putting it in for consideration for a discussion day/thread/something in the Chat Room. Increasing cisgender members' understanding of trans issues could definitely be a way to promote inclusion.

Originally Posted by Doodle.

One thing I will ask is if we could change the gender thing on our profiles to say "woman" "man" or "non-binary" instead of male of female. Female and male are sexes rather than genders. I found it a little confusing to edit when I came back due to this.

This is an interesting point as well. I agree that the options on our profiles could do with some tweaking (given that "trans" is listed as a gender in itself, when it's more correctly used as an adjective), although I'm not sure man/woman are interchangeable with nonbinary (e.g. you can identify as a man or a woman, but you wouldn't really identify as a nonbinary). Is there a way to maybe do away with the options entirely and just have it all as self-described? Not sure how feasible it is but that might be a way to encourage diversity rather than unintentionally giving the idea that people should fit themselves into particular boxes.

[Rob]

Thank you for everyone who has replied to this thread or messaged me so far. There are some great ideas already and some are things we could get started on right away. We are committed to making TeenHelp a safe & inclusive space for everyone and I would invite all of you to work together with us on this. This concern was only brought to my attention recently and we are now actively exploring solutions for this and I hope to share more soon.

[Rika]

Having a zero tolerance for transphobia, homophobia, and so on too. I see spaces make rules like that where people who post anti LGBTQ+ things get the boot.

[Blackwing]

0 tolerance policy of hate for lgbt topics and other issues that are controversial.

[Rob]

Hi everyone,

Thank you to those have shared your ideas so far, I just want to share an update on some of the actions we are taking in response to your feedback:

1) We have updated our Terms of Service with a clearer policy related to this. We have also given more focus to our existing rules related to respect, safety & wellbeing.

Equality, Diversity and Inclusion Policy

TeenHelp is a safe and inclusive space which promotes tolerance and understanding, and where all users can be themselves without judgement. We encourage everybody to ask questions and share their views with an open mind in order to foster learning and growth. All users will be treated equally regardless of their sex, sexual orientation, gender or gender identity, age, ethnicity, disability, culture, religion, political views, lifestyle or any other reason.

• Hateful descriptions or images will not be tolerated anywhere on TeenHelp. TeenHelp stands firmly against any form of hate including (but not limited to) sexism, racism, homophobia, transphobia or ableism.
• Users should respect that others may choose to identify in a wide range of ways. Users should address people in the way they prefer to be addressed, including using their chosen names and pronouns.
• Users should be sensitive to how and where they express views, for example some discussions are more suitable in the Current Events and Debates forum rather than a Support-orientated forum.

2) Updated gender & pronoun selection on the Forums and implemented it in the Chat Room.

3) Committed to publishing positive stories of trans members (and any other group too). We have an existing Stories section in our Articles, which is now more prominent on our Resources page - please share your story with us to be published.

4) We were already celebrating Pride Month, but will be adding some additional content to this now. Additionally we are reviewing our approach to content and communications.

5) We are exploring options for Staff training and incorporating this into Staff meetings.

I would invite all of you to play your role in this. If you want more stories about trans people, help to write them for us (please contact cyenfin or MsNobleEleanor to get started). If you want more positive content on social media or articles, apply to volunteer (we have roles open for all areas). TH was build on people working together on these things to make them happen. This is how we've worked since day 1 and it's how we work now, so please get involved!